Dogs prepare you for babies.
Cats prepare you for teenagers.

If the eath was flat, cats would have pushed everything off it by now.

We had to get rid of the kids, the cat was allergic.

"Dogs have Owners, Cats have Staff"
-- Unknown

"Managing senior programmers is like herding cats."
-- Dave Platt

"There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast."
-- Unknown

"Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this."
-- Anonymous

"Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow."
-- Jeff Valdez

"In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats."
-- English proverb

"As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat."
-- Ellen Perry Berkeley

"Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later."
-- Mary Bly

"Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia."
-- Joseph Wood Krutch

"People that hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life."
-- Faith Resnick

"There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats."
-- Anonymous

"I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior."
-- Hippolyte Taine

"Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God."
-- Unknown

"Time spent with cats is never wasted."
-- Colette

"Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. True, and they have many other fine qualities as well."
-- Missy Dizick

"You will always be lucky if you know how to make friends with strange cats."
-- Colonial American proverb

"Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want."
-- Joseph Wood Krutch

"My husband said it was him or the cat ... I miss him ... sometimes."
-- Unknown

"Cats aren't clean, they're covered with cat spit."
-- Unknown

"Women and cats will do as they please and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea."
-- Robert A. Heinlein

If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then give him only two of them.
-- Phil Pastoret

Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.
-- Roger Caras

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man.
-- Mark Twain

My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. That's almost $21.00 in dog money.
-- Joe Weinstein

Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog.
-- Franklin P. Jones

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
-- Andy Rooney

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.
-- Josh Billings

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.
-- Ben Williams

The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue.
-- Anonymous

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