An 85 year old man is in his doctor's office for a physical and is told by his doctor that the exam is complete. The man says, "What do you mean it's complete? You didn't do a sperm test."

The doctor explains, "Well, we don't usually do that with a man your age."

The man says, "It's not a complete physical unless you do one."

The doctor replies, "Well, if you insist. Take this vial home, fill it and bring it back tomorrow."

The next day the man returns to the doctor's office and tells him, "Doctor! Doctor! I tried it with my right hand, it didn't work. I tried it with my left hand, that didn't work either. I tried it with both hands and it still didn't work. My wife tried it with her right hand, it didn't work. She tried it with her left hand, that didn't work. She tried it with both hands and that didn't work either. Neither one of us could get the cap off!"

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