The Wit and Wisdumb of The Cynical Pessimist

Notice to readers of this page:
I self identify as a disabled, female, lesbian, black, transgender Muslim.
Therefore, if you are offended by anything you see here, you are a racist, sexist, misogynist, patriarchal, bigoted, csigender, xenophobic, Islamophobe.

I finally understand the socialist / communist / progressive / liberal support for Islam. Their heads are stuck so far up their asses that they think the Islamic terrorists they so stupidly support won't be able to behead them or send suicide bombers into their neighborhoods.

Before attempting to engage in conversation about politics with an anti-Trumper or Democrat (since both are incapable of rational thought) you need to ask them the following question:
Are you prouder of being stupid or evil?

I have to agree with the Democrat congressional aid who filmed himself having gay sex in a senate chamber that nothing he did rises to the level of disgrace that most Democrat politicians routinely commit while making backroom deals and supporting bills that harm their voters.

- Cynical Pessimist

After observing the gay porn video by a Democrat congressional aid I'm convinced that D.C. now means Degenerate Corruptocrat.

- Cynical Pessimist

The left and Democrats (but I repeat myself) like to pretend they care about cultural appropriation, yet I haven't heard any complaints about the Muslims appropriating Adolf Hitler and Nazis attempt to commit Jewish genocide.

- Cynical Pessimist

The left and Democrats (but I repeat myself) like to pretend they care about cultural appropriation, yet I didn't hear any complaints about Governor Neusom lying like Pinocchio.

- Cynical Pessimist

What's the difference between a cesspool and a democrat press pool?
You feel less dirty after swimming in a cesspool.

- Cynical Pessimist

Joe Biden held a press conference recently where he said "I never accepted a bribe. I have people who do that for me.

- Cynical Pessimist

When someone tells me they're a Democrat, the only possible response is "What other mental disorders do you have.?"

- Cynical Pessimist

After watching Democrat politicians express conceern about islands tipping over or mistaking a fire alarm for a door opener, I think I've come up with a solution.

Instead of funding "gain of fuction" for bioweapons, they need to fund "gain of function" research to increase their intelligence.

- Cynical Pessimist

With the Biden Crime Cartel setting the precedent as the most corrupt politician as a member of the most evil political party on the face of the planet, I believe it is time for common sense politician control.

- Cynical Pessimist

At Trump rallies, people chant USA. - Cynical Pessimist

The left has a new motto for whenever people disbelieve the nonsense they spew when trying to explain there's nothing wrong with what they did, or it isn't what you think it is.:

If I'm full of shit, you must acquit.

- Cynical Pessimist

When by boss docked my pay because of irregular attendance I explained I self-identify as arriving early.
He replied I should be proud of being trans-late.

- Cynical Pessimist

Hunter Biden says blaming him for the cocaine in the White House is a low blow.

- Cynical Pessimist

Now that NetFlix has bravely used a black actress to play Cleopatra in a documentary, they need to have a black actress play Abraham Lincoln in a documentary. They could even change the shooting in the theater to a lynching by the KKK at a tree.

- Cynical Pessimist

Politicians and celebrities love to talk about how it is better for our children in schools to get slaughtered by armed lunatics than protected by armed guards because gun carrying guards are more triggering for children than getting slaughtered.

I don't think they go far enough.

Law abiding citizens are triggered by politicians and celebrities surrounded by armed guards. We need to disarm all government employees and ban all armed guards for politicians and celebreties.

- Cynical Pessimist

Evil people who are too stupid to become successful criminals, become successful politicians.

- Cynical Pessimist

Locking down the country and closing most businesses to stop the spread of the flu
makes as much sense as
Locking down the country and closing most businesses to stop the spread of crime.
In both cases the cure is equally ineffective and is worse than the disease.

- Cynical Pessimist

Ask a Democrat:
How do we fix the economy?
Raise the taxes on the wealthy 1%.
Who are the wealthy 1%?
Anyone who makes more than I do.

- Cynical Pessimist

The first American revolution was fought with a musket
The second American revolution will be fought with a Musk-IT.

- Cynical Pessimist

To support Diversity, Inclusion, and Equity (DIE) we need to make womanslaughter a crime since manslaughter is a crime.

- Cynical Pessimist

A number of years ago, there was a push to accept ebonics as a new language.

With the recent election of John Fetterman and with Joe Biden occupying the White House it's time to recognize a new language, "Moronics."

- Cynical Pessimist

Transgender women prove that the best woman for any job is a man.

- Cynical Pessimist

More than 100 million people died trying socialism. Their sacrifice will be in vain if we don't continue trying socialism.

- Cynical Pessimist

Now I understand why the government is looking to ban all weapons.
They need a MAGAzine ban to survive.

- Cynical Pessimist

Liz Cheney was just defeated running as a Republican.
This clearly means she needs to start her own party.

Lizard Cheney of the Reptile Party.

- Cynical Pessimist

Is it homophobic to make Pete Buttigieg the butt of a joke?

- Cynical Pessimist

What's the difference between a homeless person and Joe Bidne?

A homeless person only gets to crap on the sidewalk. Joe Biden gets to crap on thw whole country.

- Cynical Pessimist

Here is my newest LGBTQ+BBQ+WTF Horror Micro-Fiction

Trump Gets Reelected and everything gets better.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrat Gun Control Motto:
Support gun control because no rapists, serial killers or mass murderers should fear for their lives from armed victims.

- Cynical Pessimist

If you need to be a biologist to be able to define what a women is, then you need to be a mathematician to know what 2+2 is.

- Cynical Pessimist

If Joe Biden was Captain of the Titanic, the first thing he would do is get rid of all the lifeboats except for Navy One.

When the Titanic hit the iceberg, Biden while standing in Navy One would explain how icebergs were good for the ship.

As Navy One with Biden and his minions pulled away from the sinking Titanic with everyone else onboard, he would complain that he is having a messaging problem since nobody seems to understand what a good captain he's been.

- Cynical Pessimist

Overweight people have serious health issues. The number of overweight people have created a national health emergency. The only common sense solution is to ban food.

- Cynical Pessimist

Since most politicians proclaim guns are the problem, I have a solution.

Instead of preventing law abiding citizens from owning guns ...

Let's force politicians to give up their public and private armed protection and make all government offices and prisons gun free zones. I guarantee this will reduce mass shootings in schools.

- Cynical Pessimist

Since mothers are now gestational parents, birthing people, or people with ovaries I think, it's time to come up with a new name for Democrats.

I think the new name for Democrats should be useless lump of cells or parasites without brains.

That way we won't feel bad about aborting them.

- Cynical Pessimist

PROBLEM:
Democrats are upset about baby formula shortages.
Democrats are upset about overturning Roe v Wade.

SOLUTION:
Since Democrats favor no limits on pre or post term abortions, kill them all and you've wiped out the food shortage problem.

- Cynical Pessimist

Trump Gets Reelected.
Everything gets better.

- Cynical Pessimist

If cultural appropriation is bad, why do we allow politicians to culturally appropriate low IQ individuals?

- Cynical Pessimist

Rapists agree with Joe Biden, Dr. Fauci, the CDC and Democrat politicians, women should not have the choice of what gets jabbed into their bodies.

- Cynical Pessimist

You don't have to be crazy to be a Democrat, but it helps.

- Cynical Pessimist

Disney isn't going far enough in their remake of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves. In order to correct everything wrong with the proposed remake, I offer my version of Brown Snow and Seven more average size, gender variable individuals.

- Cynical Pessimist

Beijing Biden's BBB doesn't mean "Build Back Better", but "Bring Better Bribes".

- Cynical Pessimist

If Americans bribe Joe Biden and Hunter biden with more millions of dollars than Ukraine did, will Joe Biden protect the American border?

- Cynical Pessimist

Republicans always lose because while they are taking the high road, the Democrats are undermining the road.

- Cynical Pessimist

Joe Biden is a vile, evil, despicable, excuse for a human being.
There's no need get upset since my mostly positive comment referred to him as a human being.

- Cynical Pessimist

According to leftist / Democrat thought (and I use that term loosely as they are incapable of thinking), shouldn't we cancel them for their cultural appropriation of "The Big Lie" policy that was the exclusive use of the Nazi party until the leftists / Democrats started using it against Trump and all Republicans.

- Cynical Pessimist

How can the left be winning class warfare when they have no class?

- Cynical Pessimist

The leftists moral high grounds are built on mountains of corpses.

- Cynical Pessimist

We've been told a virus that kills less than .01% of the populaion is a pandemic,
We've been told wearing masks outdoors and living under martial law and house arrest will slow the spread of the virus,
We've been told we must take a vaccine that won't cure the virus, won't protect you from getting the virus, and won't prevent you from spreading the virus,
I'm having difficulty seperating conspiracy theories from reality.

- Cynical Pessimist

Feminists need to fight against the vaccine mandate. ManDate!

- Cynical Pessimist

By making Rachel Levine, the US assistant secretary for health a four star admiral the Democrats prove once again that they believe that the best woman for any job is a man.

- Cynical Pessimist

The next time someone tells me to trust the government and Dr. Anthony Fauci when they say the Covid "vaccine" is safe for use on human subjects, I'll remind them that a number of years ago the German government and Dr Josef Mengele recommended Zyklon-B for use on human subjects. - Cynical Pessimist

The city government of San Francisco is so concerned about "public health" they are restricting entrance to buildings to people with proof of breing vaccinated, but are allowing everyone to crap on the sidewalk in front of those buildings.

- Cynical Pessimist

Joe Biden is uniting the country ... in chanting "Fuck Joe Biden."

- Cynical Pessimist

What do you call a government that forces medical procedures (take untested drugs) on unwilling citizens/subjects, but doesn't require the same procedure for the millions of illegal invaders invited into the country.

- Cynical Pessimist

If Democrat / liberal/ feminists had been in the Middle East about 2,000 years ago, they would have aborted the baby Jesus.

- Cynical Pessimist

The unvaccinated of today, are the same as the Jews of Nazi Germany.

- Cynical Pessimist

If the government vaccine mandates were about our health, they wouldn't be firing doctors and nurses and causing staff shortages in hospitals.

- Cynical Pessimist

Presidential Thief Joe Biden promised he would not leave a single American man, woman or child behind.

Promises made, promises kept.

He's leaving behind enemy lins thousands of American men, women and children.

- Cynical Pessimist

Since April 2020 America has been living one long Halloween nightmare where there are no treats, only tricks.

- Cynical Pessimist

If a Zombie pandemic ever occurs, liberals and democrats are safe because they have no brains.

- Cynical Pessimist

Today, September 17, is constitution day. We no longer have any reason to celebrate. We should give our constitution to some country that will use it since none of our high ranking (and they are very rank) officials believe or obey our constitution.

- Cynical Pessimist

I'm so proud that our Surrender-Thief, Joe Biden, planned to go to that place where some people did something.

- Cynical Pessimist

There is a joke that during World War II, Germam rocket scientists said:
We aim at the stars, but we sometimes we hit London.

In honor of Joe Biden giving Islamic terrorists the names of Americans he lrft behind to die during the retreat, and the massive amount of military gear and weapos, that phrase needs to be updated to
: Islamic terrorists can now claim:
We fight Climate Change, but sometimes we kill Amereicans.

- Cynical Pessimist

If the unvaccinated are not allowed to enter any buildings, does that mean they cannot be arrested?

- Cynical Pessimist

When did "Let Them Eat Cake" become "Make Them Wear Masks?"

- Cynical Pessimist

Instead of defunding police, we should defund politicians.

- Cynical Pessimist

Joe Biden strokes racial tensions almost as much as he strokes women's hair.

- Cynical Pessimist

If investigating voter fraud destroys faith in government, then investigating crime destroys faith in people.

- Cynical Pessimist

Treason and Democrats go together like stink on shit.

- Cynical Pessimist

If my Covid attacks a healthy individual, do the medical police give me a warning shot?

When doctors are trying to prevent a virus attack, are they required to provide a warning shot?

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats and environmentalists support Soylent Green since it is made from 100% recycled material.

- Cynical Pessimist

Since Democrats and Leftists are incapable of thinking for themselves, how do they know what to cancel, boycott, shun, and when and where to riot?
They go to Wokepedia.

- Cynical Pessimist

You might be a Democrat if requiring voter identification to vote for a corrupt incompetent Democrat candidate is voter supression,
but requiring voter verification to recall a corrupt incompetent Democrat canididate is NOT voter suppression.

- Cynical Pessimist

As a woke, Democrat, environmentalist supporter of the Soylent Green New Deal I'm recycling my used covid masks by giving them to the homeless.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats and leftists support gender fluidity.

I finally understand why.

They are intelligence fluid people who prefer channeling their inner moron.

That explains why they so rarely say something intelligent.

- Cynical Pessimist

The woke/leftist/cancel culture crowd has decided to destroy Dr. Seuss.

They believe that "No Seuss good Seuss."

- Cynical Pessimist

The sixth Circus Court of Squeals is considering a magazine ban.

Because if conservatives are allowed to read and write for magazines, then the Democrat conspiracy to oppose freedom and repeal all rights might be challenged.

- Cynical Pessimist

In Commifornia (maybe other places) politicians are passing what they euphemistically call HERO laws that force businesses to increase the pay of employees.

I think we need to return the favor with ZERO laws which reduce the pay or fine politicians every time they submit or vote for laws which hurt businesses or citizens.

- Cynical Pessimist

Presidential-Thief Joe Biden has opened the way for men to participate in women's sports and use women's bathrooms and locker rooms.
Now he needs to open the way for women to participate in men's sports and use men's bathrooms and locker rooms.

- Cynical Pessimist

Masks protect you from the virus as much as your underwear protects you from farts.

- Cynical Pessimist

The new motto of the government and big tech is:
All opinions are equal, but some opinions are more equal than others.

- Cynical Pessimist

Progressive Leftists keep telling us that if they have covered up or otherwise suppressed something then it didn't happen.

By that logic, no one has died of Covid or any other cause since the lockdown because there have been no funerals.

- Cynical Pessimist

If you believe that various government agencies investigated and found no evidence of voter fraud, then you must believe that the Gestapo and SS investigated Adolf Hitler for starting World War II and cleared him of all wrong doing.

- Cynical Pessimist

If requiring ID disenfranchises citizens from voting then requiring ID for making deposits and withdrawals disenfranchises citizens from banking.

- Cynical Pessimist

Thanks to Nancy Pelosi's move towards gender-neutral language, it is now politically incorrect to call her a motherfvcker.

Instead we need to call her a parentfvcker.

Sometimes the old ways are better.

- Cynical Pessimist

The 117th Congress ended the prayer with amen and awomen.
Now we need to follow that with hyms and hers.
The only way I can respond is to say afuck.

- Cynical Pessimist

In Pennsylvania, Democrats worked hard to bring in 110% of the registered voters to fill out ballots.

Doesn't that mean they should get the hundreds of thousands of extra ballots they brought in?

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrat politicians worked hard to make sure that Americans had nothing to be thankful for so there would be no objections to cancelling Thanksgiving.

Now they want to cancel Christmas because Santa Claus is a super spreader of Covid-19.

Because Democrats are never happy until you're not happy.

- Cynical Pessimist

At one time GOOGLE claimed their motto was "Don't Be Evil" or "Do No Evil".

After observing their active participation in voter suppression and subversion of open and free elections, their new motto should be, "Up To No Good" or "Do No Good.".

- Cynical Pessimist

Presidential election thief China Joe Biden is proud of his appointments to federal office. This diverse group of people has a wide range of gender, sex, race, and mental defect.

However, the two things they all have in common is they are all completely brainwashed with the leftist narrative and are supremely incompetent for any job that requires morals, ethics or responsibility.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats like recycling.

Now that they no longer need to continue trying to frame the President for imaginary crimes and have committed the crime of the century by stealing the presidential election, they no longer need their "Not My President" t-shirts and bumper stickers.

The Republicans can use them while watching in horror as the Democrats continue to cover up the crimes their President-thief committed over his lifetime in public office.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats claim there is no proof of any election fraud.

I like their logic.

As far as I'm concerned, without an investigation there is no proof the election was honest!

- Cynical Pessimist

The news media motto used to be, "If it bleeds it leads."

Because of their decision to change from reporting the news to faking the news, I suggest their new motto be:

"If it lies, it flies."

- Cynical Pessimist

According to Google and all the other BIG TECH social media companies, they will be removing any references to widespread voter fraud since FakeNews just announced that Biden is the president elect.

They are correct. There was no widespread voter fraud.

In the mostly honest election, 100% of the glitches, anomalies, accidents, incidents, goofs, ... occurred in favor of Biden, but they only happened in 50 of the states.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats are concerned.

The silenced majority is starting to sound off.

- Cynical Pessimist

Just like the rioting and looting is mostly peaceful ... the Democrat vote counting is mostly honest.

- Cynical Pessimist

A few years ago Donald Trump wrote a book called, "The Art Of The Deal".

After watching the election I think Joe Biden is qualified to write a book, "The Art Of The Steal."

- Cynical Pessimist

Dead and fictional characters are turning out in droves to vote for Joe Biden.

Because he's almost dead, and his PR firm has covered up his decades of criminal activity.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats are like locusts.

Because they destroy wherever they swarm.

- Cynical Pessimist

Because they share the values of the KKK, as well as Hitler, Stalin, Mao and other leaders that followed the teachings of an old dead white guys to make their nations great, but caused the massive slaughter of innocents and destroyed the lives of those it didn't kill.

- Cynical Pessimist

I was glancing at a commentary piece the other day and misread "pop media" for "poop media" then realized that I was correct the first time. The media is really "poop media" because they are so full of shit.

- Cynical Pessimist

Talking with a Democrat is like talking to someone with multiple personality disorder.

You are outnumbered and all of them are crazy.

- Cynical Pessimist

Have you ever wondered why so many on the left are deranged?

Because what aren't trans-men or trans-women are trans-plants.

- Cynical Pessimist

I have come to think of the cesspool that is FaceBook as FartBook.

Because every time they open their lieholes the hot air they spew stinks and is full of crap.

- Cynical Pessimist

What is the difference between a Republican dog walker and a Democrat dog walker?

A Republican cleans up afterwards.

A Democrat craps all over you and tells you it is good for you.

If you complain, they accuse of you of being anti-canine. and then get upset when you clean up their mess.

- Cynical Pessimist

The mass media pretend to be offended by weapons of mass destruction by using weapons of mass distortion.

- Cynical Pessimist

The Democrat party is unconcernd with the integrity of the voting system ... because there is no integrity in their party.

- Cynical Pessimist

I've been trying to figure out how so many people vote Democrat when their presidential candidate is a swamp rat who has accomplished nothing in his 47 years in office, had been credibly accused of rape, brags about accepting bribes and has a history of racism and is suffering from dementia.

Don't forget that the Democrat party claims to have answers to all America's ills, but their answers never help the poor or minorites or any of the people they claim to care about.

All the Democrat acts and policies only helps enrich their party leaders and ensures their brain dead followers obey their betters and never think or act contrary to their narrative.

I finally figured it out.

The people who vote Democrat are the brainwashables. They'll believe anything.

- Cynical Pessimist

I'm a registered Democrat.

The Democrats waste their money and clear cut forests to letter bomb me with literature so that I know who to oppose and vote against.

- Cynical Pessimist

In 1939 if Hitler had proclaimed that Jews were carriers of the Covid-19 virus, and that his science advisor Dr. Mengele had proclaimed that Concentration Camps were the only way to prevent the spread of the virus, today's Democrats would be wearing swastikas on their masks and goose-stepping to their leader.

- Cynical Pessimist

All Democrats are dishonest.

Not a single one of them that promised to, left the country after Donald Trump was elected President.

- Cynical Pessimist

Only in Commiefornia

First, the state required everyone have reusable bags.
Next, the state banned reusable bags.
Now some stores require you buy their reusable bags that they don't allow you to reuse in the stores that force you to buy them.

Because the environment or something.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats are such big assholes because they keep sticking their heads up their asses.

- Cynical Pessimist

Being left-wing is hating the whole world because you are the only person on the planet who knows how things should be run and you are facing resistance from people refusing to kneel to your new world order.

- Cynical Pessimist

Alyssa "Defund The Police" Milano called the police when she saw a teenage with an airgun shooting at a squirrel.

Because nut job.

- Cynical Pessimist

Every time I see a Democrat politician talking claiming to have ethics and morals I'm reminded of Jim Jones exhorting his followers to drink the cyanide-laced Kool-Aid.

Because you know that no matter how good the Democrats make their platform sound, their followers will all end up dead on the ground in the concrete jungle.

- Cynical Pessimist

Vote Democrat

... if you like wearing a muzzle and living under house arrest and martial law.

- Cynical Pessimist

Vote Democrat

If the Vice Presidential nominee doesn't mind working with a rapist who is a pedophile then neither should you.

- Cynical Pessimist

Governor Gruesome of Commifornia is considering banning Halloween and trick or treating.

Because everyone is already wearing masks.

- Cynical Pessimist

If Kamala Harris becomes president, she will have to ban Christmas.

Because she can't have people going around saying Ho, Ho, Ho.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats putting the RIOT in patRIOT.

- Cynical Pessimist

I'm surprised that the ACLU (Antiamercan Criminal Liberation Unit) isn't defending perverts in trenchcoats wearing nothing underneath and flashing the public.

Because the ACLU supports all other kinds of gender related activity, shouldn't they be defending flashing as just a different kind of a Gender Reveal Party.

- Cynical Pessimist

If requiring an ID disenfranchises citizens from voting, them requiring an ID disenfranchises citizens from purchasing guns.

- Cynical Pessimist

Governor Gruesome (Nussolini) of Commiefornia is so stupid that he signed a a bill providing tax credits to any business dumb enough to trust him and hire employees while suffering from the most severe lockdown in the nation and with no public plan for when, if ever, he will allow businesses to reopen.

- Cynical Pessimist

The Democrat party has a lock on two voting groups..

Joe Biden brings in the "Walking Dead."

Kamala Harris brings in the "Walking Red."

- Cynical Pessimist

If gardeners have a green thumb because everything they touch grows, then Democrats have a brown thumb because everything they touch turns to shit.

- Cynical Pessimist

Governor Gruesome (Nussolini) of Commiefornia cancelled the July 4th celebration by taking away everyone's freedom.

He's doing an instant replay by cancelling Labor Day. Because of his fascist lockdown, nobody in Commiefornia is able to work so they have nothing to celebrate.

- Cynical Pessimist

I live in Commiefornia and finally came up with an appropriate answer to the question, "How are you?"

Aside from having a psychopathic, fascist, science denying governor who is doing everything in his power to destroy all businesses, jobs and lives of every resident of the state, I'm doing fine.

- Cynical Pessimist

Open Letter to Democrat Party Leaders:

(I laugh every time you are called Democratic as you are many things, but Democratic is not one of them.)

Some of your lying, dog-faced pony soldiers are complaining that you have strayed from your roots. That is a lie. You have simply stopped hiding your true motives. You are returning to your roots of supporting slavery, witch-hunting and every other evil known to mankind while pretending to do this for the good of the people.

My athiest, Nazi, and Klan brothers know what you are doing and are waiting for your great race war to capture and sell into slavery, drive out of our nation, or kill every race, gender and free thinker that has kept you from office for so long.

My only complaint is that all the rioting and looting is taking place in Democrat controlled cities. When will you be bringing the lawless mayhem to Republican cities. I could use a new color TV and other household appliances at 100% discount.

Burn Baby Burn!

Heil Hillary.

Joe Bin Hiden's new motto:

A vote for Joe is a vote for the Ho.

- Cynical Pessimist

Vote for me.

Because I supported the rioting and looting until I opposed it.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrat voters like to be kept in the dark and fed shit, which is prefect since Democrat politicians are full of shit and consistently feed shit to the public.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrat sh!tholes cities around the country are defunding police and providing the funds to Planned Parenthood.

Democrat sh!tholes cities are proud of the peaceful protests now taking place.

Why not save the funding for Planned Parenthood for some other worthy cause, and instead provide antifa and BLM with coat hangers. I'm sure they will use the same care and sensitivity they use in their peaceful protests when they go door to door aborting fetuses they don't want to live.

- Cynical Pessimist

California is suffering through two major forest fires.

Where are the lockdown fascists and mask nazis protecting the people from the air that is unhealthy to breathe?

- Cynical Pessimist

Kamala Harris is breaking the glass ceiling and is a shining example for all Democrat women.

Democrat women and the MeToo movement proved that women don't need to be sexual objects to advance their politicial careers (1).
(1) Although she provided sexual favors to achieve many of her political gains.

Minorities have a place in the Democrat party (2).
(2) Although pretending to be Black will get you further than pretending to be Indian.

Corruption is no hindrance to political office (3).
(3) Corrupt Hillary Clinton preceeded her, but she doesn't count since Democrats are good at ignoring An Inconvenient Truth.

No woman has have been selected as a vice president candidate (4).
(4) Sarah Palin is a woman and a Republican so she doesn't count.

- Cynical Pessimist

Do you know why nobody plays drinking games for every time Barack Hussein Obama tells a lie?

Because they would die of alcohol poisoning before the speech ended.

- Cynical Pessimist

A recent study proved that college is more deadly to students than Covid-19.

Save your child's life and shut down all colleges permanently!

Because Children's Lives Matter!

- Cynical Pessimist

Vote Democrat

Support the Soylent Green New Deal

- Cynical Pessimist

Support mail-in ballots ... for those who have difficulty getting to the polling place.

#DeadVotersMatter

- Cynical Pessimist

Since when is it against the law for the dead to vote?

The dead have rights.

When so many living people don't bother to vote, disenfranchising the dead only suppresses the voting dead. Everyone should be encouraged to vote.

Because Dead Voters Matter.

- Cynical Pessimist

Support elder abuse.

Vote for Biden so you can watch the spectacle of him being declared unfit for office immediately after he wins the election.

- Cynical Pessimist

I'm not going to complain about Kamala Harris sleeping with men to advance her political career.

I'm not going to complain that she supports men who identify as women competing in women's sports.

I'm not going to complain that while Attorney General of California she fought to keep innocent men in jail.

I'm not going to complain that she falsely accused Judge Cavanaugh of rape.

I'm not going to complain that she supports a presidential candidate who has credible accusatons of rape.

I'm not going to complain that she is committing cultural appropriation by pretending to be black.

I'm not going to complain that she supports a presidential candidate who she believes is racist.

Because she is the best candidate the Democrat Party can come up with.

- Cynical Pessimist

This is what I came up with.

I just started an alternate history novel.

'Quid Pro Quo' Joe Stallin, the Fearless Leader of the United States of Russia was in a competition with the Presidente Supremo of the United Socialist States of America to see who could implement the most oppressive measures on the "workers." Killing was easy. That's what gulags and reeducation camps were for. Oppression was hard.

One night in bed with his vice-Fearless Leader, Kameltoe Ho, the itching in his nether region gave him an idea.

He needed to get rid of Ho who spread her legs for every politician who promised to help her.

His other idea was to fund another five year plan to have the scientists on the government payoll (there weren't any other kind) create a bioweapon to attack his population.

None of his other five year plans had worked, but that was no reason to give up and try something new. All his scientists agreed that five year plans worked, they just hadn't been implemented correctly. Ever since the last purge removed any scientists that disagreed with him, all the remaining scientists were employed by the government and supported his regime 1,000%.

The only problem with his newest five year plan was that many of his scientists were still caught up in the middle of his most recent five year plan to determine if the cold winters were caused by global warming or global cooling. There were still some scientists caught up in an older five year plan to prove whether the Earth was flat or round. In any case since his scientists were so dedicated to their causes, they didn't put much effort into creating the bioweapon he ordered them to make. As a consequence, the bioweapon was a dud since it killed less than .01% of the population and barely inconvenienced the rest.

However that gave Stallin an idea. What if he pretended the bioweapon was a real threat to the world population. His pet scientists were too all busy fighting each so that none of them would have time or interest in disputing his claim. Beside, he paid them to agree with him so none would dare contradict his plan. Then he conspired with the mayors and governors to institute the crazy kind of repression that was common and popular in the United Socialist States of America.

Fifty years later Fearless Leader Stallin was happy about the temporary lockdown that was still in place to protect the "workers" from his bioweapon.

- Cynical Pessimist

It is a federal crime to interfere with the United States mail(*).

(*) Unless you are a ballot harvester or some other agent of the Democrat Party committing voter fraud.

- Cynical Pessimist

Vote Democrat.

Because no other party is as good at killing the sick and elderly and lying about it as the Democrats.

- Cynical Pessimist

After watching clips of Democrats lying so blatantly that even Adolf Hitler's chief of propaganda Joseph Goebbels would blush, I am left with only one thought.

The only good Democrat is a dead Democrat.

- Cynical Pessimist

Oprah has a net worth of over 2.5 billion dollars.
She's black.

So, using Democrat/leftist/liberal logic:

I don't have anywhere near that amount of money.
I'm a white male.

The only possible reason must be Female Privilege and Black Privilege.

- Cynical Pessimist

Joe Biden, who is using the Witless Protection Program to hide from inconvenient questions, hasn't picked a VP yet.

Uncle Joe is so confused that he thinks the Democrats will take him out as soon as he picks one.

He shouldn't be concerned.

Because they won't take him out until a minute after he takes the oath of office.

- Cynical Pessimist

I think the Democrats new motto should be:

Just because we lied to you doesn't mean we can't be trusted.

- Cynical Pessimist

If you're still a Democrat after the Russia Collusion Hoax, the Ukraine Collusion Hoax and the WuHan Corona Virus lockdown you just tested positive for stupid.

- Cynical Pessimist

I'm voting for Joe Biden for President for 2020 as well as all other Democrats on the ballot.

Because I'm tired of living in a state where rioting and looting is illegal and self-defense is legal.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrat mayors and governors who are supporting the rioting and looting by ordering police to stand down, are hoping that will discourage law abiding Republicans from voting.

- Cynical Pessimist

The Democrat Party supports family values ... Manson Family values.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats promote and support identity politics.

Because "Divide and Conquer" ALWAYS wins the war.

- Cynical Pessimist

Joe Biden is in the "Witless Protection Program."

This program protects witless politicians from having to explain themselves or their programs.

- Cynical Pessimist

The Rolling Stones don't want President Trump using their song, "You can't Always Get What You What" at his rallies.

Ya know, the Rolling Stones need to lose their recording contract and have all their records, CDs, DVDs, ... banned.

"Paint It Black" is offensive since it is racist or cultural appropriation or something bad.

- Cynical Pessimist

At a news conference Governor Gruesome (Nussolini) told all California residents that he is cancelling fireworks and closing beaches for the 4th of July.

Because why should he allow American citizens to celebrate freedom when he has taken it away from them.

- Cynical Pessimist

July 4th 2020 celebrations are being cancelled this year since Americans just had their freedom taken away.

- Cynical Pessimist

The Democrats are correct. There is systemic racism ... by Democrats.

Just like the Democrats never forgave Trump for beating Hillary Clinton, the Democrats never forgave the Republicans for freeing their slaves.

- Cynical Pessimist

Most left leaning people make the leaning Tower of Pisa seem upright.

- Cynical Pessimist

Demand Socialism:

Because millions of innocents won't be slaughterd and billions won't be oppressed if the deluded expendable idiots don't support socialism.

- Cynical Pessimist

Calling the Democrat Party the Democratic Party is like calling the Nazi Party the Humanitarian Party.

- Cynical Pessimist

If the Democrats/leftists/socialists/communists manage to defund the police, then who will be left to generate income by handing out tickets for dispensers of plastic straws, soda cups larger than 16 ounces or the billions of other laws that oppress and steal our basic rights?

- Cynical Pessimist

Even with socialist distancing, politicians can still screw hookers from six feet away since they are such big dicks.

- Cynical Pessimist

This lockdown is bad for the sex worker industry.

The politicians are so busy screwing the country, they don't have time to screw hookers and mistresses.

- Cynical Pessimist

I can't believe our government just let 50,000 people die of the flu last year, when all they had to do was shut down the economy and put 20 million people out of work ...

- Cynical Pessimist

It's a good thing the Democrats engineered a phony pandemic panic. Otherwise how would their sexual predator candidate suffering from dementia win an election against the President who rescued American from Barack Hussein Obama's dying economy and failing coup?

- Cynical Pessimist

Listening to the daily Coronavirus (Covid-19, Kung Flu, Winnie the Flu, Chinese Flu) death count is as useful as listening to the daily automobile fatalities or the daily shootings in gun free Chicago.

They provide no useful information to the average user.

- Cynical Pessimist

If Adolf Hitler were alive today, he would be jealous of the Democrat party. If he'd only known he could take away ALL citizens rights by claiming to be fighting a virus, he could have easily killed all the Jews with the approval of every Democrat leader.

- Cynical Pessimist

Now that I have seen the fascist, tyrannical, dictatorial efforts of California Governor Gavin Gruesome (Nussolini), Michigan Governor Witless and other un-Democratic leaders, I now believe in UFOs.

Useless Fucking Officials.

The ONLY solution, is:
Kill them all and let God sort them out.

- Cynical Pessimist

Leftists/Democrats (but I repeat myself) are promoting the false idea that women are discouraged from pursuing careers in science, technology, engineering, and mathematics (STEM).

I don't know why it matters since the Leftist/Democrat response to the Covid-19 virus makes it obvious that they are science deniers.

- Cynical Pessimist

Trying to understand Democrat logic would cause heads to spin so fast that they could be used as a better alternative power source than windmills powered by the hot air spewed by politicians.

- Cynical Pessimist

The leftist/Democrats are unhappy that the new unemployment figures are dropping.

However, they don't mind that much since the drop in unemployment is because the number of people with jobs is dropping.

- Cynical Pessimist

Dr. Fraud (or is that Dr. Fascist) and Dr. Bullshit have accomplished what the impeachment witch hunt and the rest of the Democrat dirty tricks were unable to do, destroy America.

Congratulations on condemming our children, grandchildren and and descendants to a life of grinding poverty and misery.

Hitler, Stalin, Mao and the rest of your death cult are proud of you.

- Cynical Pessimist

I was driving past a cemetery the other day when I realized the graves were less than six feet apart. OMG! During the coming zombie apocalypse they'll be spreading the coronavirus!

- Cynical Pessimist

What is the difference between a socialist country and a capitalist country?

In times of shortages:

In a socialist country you see lines of people waiting for the product to be restocked on the empty shelves.

In a capitalist country, the price rises until people stop buying/hoarding the item in question and competitors enter the market to take advantage of the higher profits. This causes the supply to increase and the prices to fall.

Welcome to the United Socialist States of America.

Because in the leftist brainwashing factories that masquerade as educational institutions they have been teaching your children that slavery is freedom.

- Cynical Pessimist

Government is the root of all evil.

- Cynical Pessimist

Today is National Burrito Day.

I normally don't care much about holidays, but the holiday I would most like to see is "National Suicide Bomber Take your Family To Work Day".

- Cynical Pessimist

When I look around and see lines out the door at grocery stores and the entire population confined to their homes I realize that Bernie Sanders won the election.

Because we are now enjoying the lifestyle (deathstyle) that socialism always provides.

- Cynical Pessimist

What can you say when someone tells you that immigration is not a crime?
Tell them that breaking and entering is a crime.
Tell them that invading a country is a crime.

- Cynical Pessimist

Now that our politicians are practicing social distancing, the Democrats can't fuck their hookers and mistresses so they have settled for fucking the country.

- Cynical Pessimist

I keep expecting to hear a Democrat say:
I'm not afraid of the coronavirus because nothing could be worse than Trump being president.

- Cynical Pessimist

Have you hugged your coronavirus today?

Because leftist are dying to show they're not racist.

- Cynical Pessimist

More people are slaughtered annually in Democrat run gun-free zone Chicago, than have died of Coronavirus in all of America since the beginning of the year.

Because Democrats only care about the deaths of innocents if they can be blamed on Trump and aren't caused by themselves.

- Cynical Pessimist

Has anybody stopped and asked why people are supposed to go to work, but restaurants, bars and clubs are closed (Bread and Circuses)?

Because if all the people who work get infected and die, that leaves the parasites and freeloaders who are easily manipulated by the media and the left.

- Cynical Pessimist

What is the difference between Democrat Socialists and National Socialists?

The Democrat Socialists haven't started building ovens to throw Jews and other deplorables into.

- Cynical Pessimist

Vote for Biden for President. Because if you don't, he might end up in the Big House rather than the White House

- Cynical Pessimist

I'm a Democrat ... because, where else can a science denier with no common sense get respect for their "common sense" solutions.

- Cynical Pessimist

Did you hear about the lesbian who dated a trans-woman and then sued for male fraud.

- Cynical Pessimist

I think the Democrats new motto should be:
Just because we can't count a vote doesn't mean we can't ruin a country.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats: The Voice Of Treason

Republicans: The Voice Of Reason

- Cynical Pessimist

Inspired by Don Lemon's non-apology, I have a new motto for Democrat Party.

Democrats are not vile, evil, stupid people just because everything that spews from their lieholes is vile, evil, and stupid.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

I thought about it for a moment and then went ahead and made copies for myself and my friends.

If I'm ever brought to trial, I'll lie.

After all, the FBI just spent the last 2.5 years lying to the FISA court so clearly the FBI approves of lying to the judge if you want something enough.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Because when a black swings at the end of a noose, he will vote Democrat for centuries to come.

- Cynical Pessimist

If you increase income tax to 100% of earnings, then healthcare for all will be 100% free.

Except for that pesky deductible.

- Cynical Pessimist

Because they hate spending anything to, for, or with conservatives.

- Cynical Pessimist

Because Democrats are so used to breaking the law, they forget that some people still believe in and obey it.

- Cynical Pessimist

Because the Democrats in congress are too busy playing pin the Democrat crimes on the Republican victims.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

The only way for Democrats to save the country is to set the flag on fire when they are wrapped up in it pretending to care for the country they hate.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Were you born evil, sick, twisted, and perverted, or were you made that way by believing Democrat propaganda?

- Cynical Pessimist

This is what I came up with.

Republicans
Are
Compassionate
Intelligent
Sympathetic
Truthtellers

(RACIST)

- Cynical Pessimist

Demons could never be as vile and evil as Democrats.
Crap may stink, but not as much as Democrats.
Rats are nasty, but never as nasty as Democrats.

I've come up with a new term for them. DemoCracks.
Because everyone who supports them acts like people on psychotropic drugs.
They lose all ability to act rationally.
They lose the ability to think for themselves.
They lose the ability to see the difference between right and wrong.
And when they are separated from their source of their insanity, they suffer withdrawals.

DemoCracks.

Friends don't let their friends injest DemoCrack pablum.

- Cynical Pessimist

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Q: Why don't Republicans try to change the minds of Democrats.
A: They can't, because to be a Democrat you can't have a mind that changes.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Evil
Stupid
Propagandists

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

However, I do believe the leftists are brainwashed in the propaganda factories that masquerade as education institutions where they are taught to support the narrative, follow orders, and above all else, never think for themselves.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Because Bubonic Plague (Black Death), tuberculosis, typhus are only looking for their place in the American dream.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

My problem is that they are abusing their stupid privilege to do it. Every time they open their mouths, they spew something more stupid than the last time which causes their minions and flunkies to grow more stupid every time they listen or believe the newest idiocy.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

The Democrats claim they oppose shutting down the border or increasing import fees because it is bad for the economy.

So, does that mean bringing in millions of new welfare recipients who will be provided with free health care and lifetime room and board for them and their extended families is good for the economy?

- Cynical Pessimist

Because they oppose inconvenient youths.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

That just isn't possible. The only sex Democrats ever have is group sex.

They seem to really enjoy screwing the country.

- Cynical Pessimist

Doctors can now kill children before, during or just after birth.

Doctors can now refuse experimental drugs to the terminally ill.

Because nothing is more important to the leftist than making space for future illegal aliens.

- Cynical Pessimist

The strategists came up with Make America Miserable Again. However, most of their alternate gender supporters are offended that the abbreviation is MAMA. They think that word stands for traditional binary gender families with children.

To avoid the unfortunate misconception that the DemocRat party supports tradition families or having children, they are promoting the Affordable Child Care Act. They want all their supporters to know that if they want their child, they can keep their child.

Unfortunately that isn't as much of a draw as the party leaders hoped it would be because every gender that can carry a child is rushing to get pregnant so they can have an abortion, while the Republicans continue to get pregnant so they can have children.

- Cynical Pessimist

News Flash:
The left is getting ready to ban any publication that is issued on a regular basis.
Because MAGAzines are unacceptable in a woke world.

- Cynical Pessimist

Has anyone considered that something good might come from the perpetually offended snowflakes graduating from college that can't think and have no knowledge of history?
The aggressively ignorant students who leave school dumber than when they entered are always looking for something new to take offense at. In their never ending quest to be offended by the world around them, they might have to throw off the blinders imposed by their leftist brainwashers at the propaganda factories and study history from before they were born. There is a small possibility that kind of research might cause them to think for themselves.

- Cynical Pessimist

If men can't have an opinion on abortion because they don't have a vagina ...
then women can't have an opinion on guns if they don't own any.
When women proclaim that guns are bad because they kill people.
The correct response is: Where do you think the people came from that pulled the triggers?

- Cynical Pessimist

If we don't do something drastic immediately to stop global cooling warming something then the world will end five years ago.

- Cynical Pessimist

A number of DemocRats are crawling out from under the rocks where they have been hiding and are now proclaiming they are ready to stand up for their country.
I wish I knew what country they are standing up for, because it is obviously not America.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats claim they are standing up for their country.
I wish I knew what country that is.

- Cynical Pessimist

The one thing you can always count on is that Ocassional Cortex will spew something stupid or wrong from her lie hole.

- Cynical Pessimist

Because Leftist Lies Matter.

- Cynical Pessimist

Vote Democrat.
Show your support for illegal aliens and drug cartels and hatred for America and Americans.

- Cynical Pessimist

There is no-one so close-minded as an open-minded liberal.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

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- Cynical Pessimist

The complete destruction of western civilization won't happen without your support.

Remember: vote early and vote often.
Don't let death or non-citizenship discourage you from voting.
You have just as much right to hate Americans as recent immigrants and native born traitors.

- Cynical Pessimist

The Democrat Party, Feminists, and LGBTQ+ want to help celebrate the opening of a new mosque near groud zero. The Muslims will start the festivities by throwing LGBTQ+ members off the roof. After that they will rape all the women and sell them into slavery. The closing ceremonies will include the slaughter of any remaining infidels. A good time is guaranteed for all in attendance.

- Cynical Pessimist

It used to be there was only one profession, weatherman, where you could be 100% wrong and still be considered an expert.
We need to add "reporter" to that list. The MainStream Media spew lies 100% of the time and still consider themselves truthful.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama proved that his natural stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.

- Cynical Pessimist

I'm still upset at Russia meddling in American elections. Only Democrats are allowed to do that.

- Cynical Pessimist

What is the difference between the Democrat Party and Hydra (the Marvel Universe global evil empire)?
Please tell me because I can't see any difference.
They both slaughter any person they can't brainwash.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats and pedophiles agree, parents should NOT be separated from their children.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats and the KKK agree, blacks belong in race separated safe spaces.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats and Antifa agree, they are the only ones who deserve freedom of speech.

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats and Antifa agree, violence is the answer to every question.

- Cynical Pessimist

If Trump is NOT your president, then America is NOT your country. Get the hell out!

- Cynical Pessimist

Democrats claim they care about America and Americans.
I won't believe them until they call for the arrest of Maxine "Raging" Waters for inciting violence against Americans.

- Cynical Pessimist

I've been reading The Chronicles of Riddick and was having difficulty believing that a group of humans (the Necromongers) wanted to exterminate the human race (including themselves), until I realized that it was a futuristic version of the Democrat party.

- Cynical Pessimist

I'm so woke, that if I witnessed Barack Hussein Obama raping and murdering a woman, I would dismiss it as part of the vast right-wing conspiracy. If the FBI and DOJ then bungled the cover-up I would then admit he did it, but explain how being raped and murdered by Barack Hussein Obama is empowering for women.

- Cynical Pessimist

Did you hear the one about the Democrat who was so stupid that he shot up a Mainstream Media outlet when they claimed they were impartial and unbiased?
- Cynical Pessimist

Leftists prefer failure over success if success contradicts their narrative.

The FBI's new motto is:
See something, say something and we'll do nothing.

The FBI's new motto is:
See something, say nothing.
Because it makes us look bad when we ignore legitimate crimes to pursue bogus investigations.

The Faking Bogus Investigations (FBI) agency issued indictments against against Russians for attempting and failing to change the course of the election. They insist that they will not let absolving Trump of any wrongdoing prevent them from continuing their investigation. They have a fraudulent report they are relying on to justify their continuing witch hunt to subvert the constution and overthrow the election results.
Leftists can rest easy knowing that the FBI is anxious to do their dirty work.

After the Parkland school shooting, the Fumbling Bureaucratic Incompetents (FBI) were quick to announce that because the bureau of Faking Bogus Investigations (FBI) were so heavily involved with subverting the constitution and trying to overthrow the President, they successfuly ignored multiple warnings about the potential school shooter.
Therefore 17 deaths of innocents is a small price to pay for the knowledge that they will not rest until justice is subverted and Amercia has become the 3rd world hellhole that the leftists want it to be.

New York Democrats are so progressive that they will soon be putting health warnings on suicide bombers vests.

A physics professor slanders science fiction by comparing it to "climate science."
He is wrong. Science fiction is a LOT more believable than "climate science" and has way more accurate predictions of the future.

I just witnessed a miracle in Mexifornia where I live.
I saw a brand new pickup truck that wasn't vandalized.
It had two bumper stickers on it.
1) Trump
2) Hell No Hillary.

If Donald Trump is literally Hitler, then Bill Clinton is literally Jack the Ripper and Barack Hussein Obama is Judas Iscariot.

The success of the DummyCrat party rests on its ability to impliment the absolute worst solution in a time of crisis.

Democrats support brainwashing because it helps keep their brains clean.

Berkeley used to be the cradle of free speech, Now it's the graveyard of free speech.

We need to ban guns because it is unfair that women who don't carry guns are raped and murdered more frequently than women who do carry guns.

Last Sunday I enjoyed my drive to work.
Except for:
The freeway, where every time I signaled a lane change, someone cut me off.
The surface streets, where people made left turns from the right turn lane, right turns from the left turn lane, and stopped at intersections when the light was green.
The alley leading into the parking lot, where people were parked underneath the no parking in alley signs.

Q: How do open minded / free speech loving Regressive / Libturds keep themselves warm at night?
A: They burn books and heretics.

Q: Why do feminists care about abortions?
A: None of them will ever have sex with a man.

Feminists celebrate take your daughter to work day for female suicide bombers. Proof that women can do any job that men can.

British version of ObamaCare has no "death panels." They just determine that patients have no right to life. Makes perfect sense to Regressive / Libturds.

Feminists claim glaciers are female.
Black Lies Matter claim glaciers are racist (glaciers are white).
Because of their divisive policies, Regressive / Libturds don't know which minority to pander to.
The science is unsettled.

Regressive / Libturd Kathy Griffin, who wouldn't know a joke if you beat her to death with it, is sorry that the deplorables don't enjoy images of a horribly slaughtered POTUS as much as she and her friends do.

Comey lied, America died.

Comey lied, Hillary Flied.

Pizza Hut Israel apologized for mocking a Palestinian Terrorist for his virtual hunger strike. Offended terrorists promise to boycott Pizza Hut.
Finally a place where terrorist bombers won't go.

I had trouble understanding the Regressive / Libturd support for Islamic Terrorists until I figured out that they both support LGBT rights the same way:
Lynch Blacks, Gays and Trans

Q: How can you recognize a progressive / liberal / leftist / democrat?
A: They are so brainwashed they have soap dribbling out of their ears.

Q: Did you hear about the overpaid and underworked Yale doctoral students who went on a hunger strike for higher pay.
A: They will continue fasting (except for food breaks) until the administration caves to their demands.

Q: Did you hear about the marijuana activist who wanted to give politicians joints?
A: He changed his mind when he realized nothing good could come from giving dope to dopes.

Q: Why are moderate Muslims like unicorns?
A: Everyone talks about them, but nobody can find them.

The three Rs used to mean Reading, wRiting and aRithmetic.
These days it means Rebellion, Rioting and Repression

Police are investigating a black muslim who shouted "Allahu Akbar" and "death to whites" while killing white men.
His motives are unclear because he didn't have a terrorist ID card on him.

Feminist hero Fauxcahontas, obeyed her husband when he told her not to run for president in 2016.
I guess there were already too many indians running for president. Or something.

Nothing says feminism like support of Muslim oppression of women.
After all, women in Muslim countries are free to not wear the hijab. As long as they don't mind being raped or killed for their immodesty.

Hillary Clinton is now holding a contest for the best reasons why she lost the election.
Reasons that she won't accept include:
her contempt for American citizens
her corruption
her criminality
her failing physical health
her failing mental health

Hillary Clinton still blames her loss on her sex.
I don't understand why Bill preferring anyone but her should be a problem.
Oops.
Maybe she means she should get a sex change operation. Although I believe she will lose whether she is a cunt or a dick.

You still don't get it, do you? Regressive / Libturds lie! That's what they do! That's ALL they do! You can't stop them!
(cue terminator music)

Politicians in sanctuary cities around the country declare war on law abiding citizens by releasing hundreds of illegal alien criminals.
If you can't do the time, claim illegal alien status.

Michael Moore, surfacing like Moby Dick, spews more hot air than a Texas Tornado. Much like the white whale, there is no sense in anything emerging from his blowhole.

Hillary Clinton is one woman who's place isn't in the home, but in prison.

Political hack / FBI Director James Comey will lead the cover up, I mean investigation, of Barack Obama's targeting of political enemies. When asked about the illegal spying, Barack Hussein Obama replied, "If you like your privacy, you can keep your privacy."

Obama Lied, Democracy Died.

How many felons must a liberal free
before they kill a man?
The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind
The answer is blowin' in the wind.

The phrase "there are three kinds of lies-lies, damned lies and statistics" needs to be updated to "there are three kinds of lies-lies, damned lies and anything a Democrat says."

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

However, since the liberals believe that the constitution needs to change with the times, so too does the Statue of Liberty.
They now think it should read:
Give me your rapists, your murderers, your criminal class yearning to wreak havoc.

- Cynical Pessimist

Then they came for the Christians, and I did not speak out-Because I was not a Christian.

Then they came for me-and there was no one left to speak for me.

- Cynical Pessimist

Q: What do Democrats and Muslims have in common?
A: They both hate America and Americans.

Q: What is the difference between a Democrat and a sleeper agent implanted by an enemy of America?
A: A sleeper agent can find things to like about America.

Q: Why does the mainstream media and the left lie all the time?
A: They are conserving the truth for the future.

Q: Why does the New York Times spend so much time searching for Russian Intelligence?
A: It's because they haven't been able to find any signs of intelligence at the New York Times.

- Cynical Pessimist

His word is truthful and honest when given to a Muslim.

However, as the Koran commands, he is dishonest with infidels.

As a Marxist, he is doing his best to debase and subvert the meaning of words to prepare for the overthrow of the United States:
transparent = cover up
truth = lie
unite = devide
peaceful protest = violent protest
obey the law = disobey the law
non-political = partisan

- Cynical Pessimist

When there is no right or wrong the left wins.

I just figured out how to reduce the Regressive / Libturd threat to the US. Force all their women to work in refugee camps. If any survive being raped and murdered, give them the option of becoming conservative or extending their stay in refugee camps.
Eventually the problem will be solved.

The Regressive / Libturds need to subvert the constitution to fit their narrative.
Then folk wisdom also needs to change.
for example:
Stick and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me.
becomes:
Stick and stones may break my bones but words must be stopped with even greater violence.

The Democratic Party is the party of the people.
The hypocritical, elite, wealthy, arrogant, leftist, racist, power mad, American hating people.
Anyone who is not a member of their elite group, is one of the irredeemable deplorables.

USA Today claims that ALL whites killed MLK.
If that is true then USA Today caused global warming by slaughtering billions of defensless trees which they then shipped off to factories where the defenseless trees were tortured and mutiliated to make paper.

A Maryland school employee was fired for correcting a student's spelling.
How horrible. No student should ever have to face the trauma of finding out they don't know everything.

Nancy Pelosi wants a full, independent investigation with consequences for the Russian hacking of the recent election.
Really?
Then why doesn't she want a full, independent investigation in Ferguson where the United States government tried to frame and railroad an honest cop for the accidental death of a thug trying to kill him?

Regressive / Libturd Nancy Pelosi wants us to put as much thought into repealing Obamacare as she put into enacting the law.
Really?
She campaigned for the law by saying we needed to vote for the bill to find out what is in it.
If that is what passes for intelligent thought with her, I'd hate to see irrational unthinking responses.
No wait, I have. It's called anti-trump Derangement Syndrome. And she and all the others on the left are suffering from it.

I've been wondering why Regressive / Libturds have been acting batshit crazy since their voter intimidation and voter fraud failed to prevent Donald Trump from being elected President.
Then it hit me.
Their reaction is the same as Muslims upon hearing the Prophet Muhammad had been slandered.

Barack Hussein Obama continues his scorched earth policy with his war on police in Chicago and other cities because saving the lives of thugs overrides his concern for innocent black lives.

Rosie O'Donnell wants martial law.
I want Rosie O'Donnell and the other frothing at the mouth limousine liberals exiled to third world hellholes where they can enjoy the world they want the rest of us to live.
We can't always get what we want.

Since there aren't enough white perpetrators of hate crimes for the liberals to complain about, the liberals keep making up hate crimes. But like all liberal activities, they are ill conceived and poorly executed.

The Infernal Reaming Service (IRS) spent millions of dollars for a system to protect email from deletion then never used it. Proof positive (if you ever needed it) that there isn't any government organization that obeys the laws or protects citizens rights.

Liberal Ashley Judd says that yellow is the code word for white. So that means the news will soon be full of stories about the white Asians. In which case White blacks can't be too far behind.

Barack Hussein Obama, the food-stamp president (millions more on the dole after he took office) is now the American Dream president because food stamps can now be used to buy anything you want from amazon.com

The term "Fake News" was invented by the main stream media to slander anyone who reported the truth. The main stream media are now upset because everyone is using it to describe how the main stream media butchers the truth.

Narcissist-in-chief Barack Hussein Obama's farewell speech mentioned himself 75 times, lasted longer than the last 3 POTUS speechs combined and included enough fake news to last a sane person a lifetime.
Liberals (sanity challenged by definition) cheered.

Barack Hussein Obama claims post racial America was unrealistic.
Whether that was true before he took office, his stoking the flames of racial hatred has certainly made that impossible for the near future.

Since the National Security Council believes that the threat of Climate Change is more dangerous than the daily terrorists attacks, they should all turn in their guns and carry thermometers instead.

ObamaCare: Because nothing says success (or freedom) like people losing their homes because the government forces them to pay for insurance they can't afford and doctors won't accept.

ObamaCare: Because who wants freedom of choice in health care when the government can order you to do whatever it wants to.

ObamaCare: The gift that just keeps on giving. Like cancer or any other non-treatable deadly ailment.

Barack Hussein Obama calls the constitution of the United States just a piece of paper. Considering his actions, I'm surprised his last act as President of the United States isn't to wipe his A$$ with it.

What is the lesson of the four blacks torturing a white man live on FaceBook and screaming F*ck Whites?
The lesson is that the mainstream Media will cover up for their actions.
The lesson is that liberal politicans will claim that no matter what Blacks do, only whites can be racist.

Thanks to Barack Hussein Obama, Black Lies Matter.
If you like your race relations, you’ll get to keep your race relations.

Recently California, the most lawless state in the country, hired Eric Holder, the most lawless attorney general in the country, to support their fight to disobey any law that offends them.

University of Chicago students planned to commit violence against Trump's Press Secretary, who was coming to speak, in support of non-violence and free speech, none of which can be allowed to anyone who disagrees with them.

In a recent press interview, Barack Hussein Obama claimed his administration was scandal free.
Considering the many crimes he and his staff committed, then there may not be any crime that he would consider a scandal. Other than a republican being honestly elected to office.

Barack Hussein Obama recently braggged about the remarkable progress made for his agenda.
Unfortunately, his goal was the destruction of America and freedom and prosperity.

Barack Hussein Obama has promised he will punish Russia because someone exposed the corruption in the heart of the Democratic party.
Watch out for the hashtag assault and red lines in the sand.

I am confident that if I had run again I think I could’ve mobilized a majority of the American people to rally behind.
- Barack Hussein Obama
If you like your health care plan, you can keep it.
- Barack Hussein Obama

The basic laws of economics.
To paraphrase Mark Twain, "If you don't know the laws of economics, you're uninformed. If you studied economics in progressive/liberal schools, you're mis-informed.

Barack Hussein Obama and the United Nations, two forces for evil. One down and one to go.

A Muslim rapist recently told the court, "It is hard to get a girlfriend if you have nothing to offer. I wanted to have sex."
All I could think of isn't that what Bill Clinton says every time Hillary catches him with another woman?

The Cheesecake Factory doesn't allow police in when carrying guns. Does that mean their employees will fight criminals with pies?

Liberal Logic: Since a woman saying no to a Muslim rapist doesn't seem to stop the rape, Austrian police are handing out whistles because whistling at their rapists is much more effective than just saying no.

Barack Hussein Obama claims the economy has completely recovered under his watch.
As far as I can tell, if the Barack Hussein Obama recovery had lasted much longer, no one other than our government overseers would have jobs.

Fake new alert. The mainstream media is saying something.

Bill Clinton forgot to blame Globull Warming for Hillary's loss.

Why would Russia prefer Donald Trump over Hillary Clinton?
If they bribed her with contributions to the Clinton Foundation like every one else they would get whatever favors they wanted.

Muslims claim they feel excluded from America.
Maybe we can behead some infidels and rape some women so the Muslims won't feel excluded from America.

Why don't Muslim women need self defense courses?
They might resist the Koran approved beatings from their owners or husbands.
They might object to being forced to wear suicide bomber vests.

Morocco TV recently had a show teaching Muslim women how to put on makeup.
I'm not sure why because how else will everyone know that the man of the family has been beating his wife in a Koran approved fashion.

Morocco TV recently had a show teaching Muslim women how to put on makeup.
That seems redundant because the niqab covers their face better than any makeup.

Morocco TV recently had a show teaching Muslim women how to put on makeup.
What does the modern Muslim wife in Morocco wear?
Makeup to cover the beatings from her moderate Muslim husband.

Islamic Terrorism: The only activity that the progressive left doesn't think needs a trigger warning.

To all the leftists who are upset at Donald Trump being elected President of the United States, I would like to quote Hilary Clinton's response to the deaths of four Americans in Benghazi.
"What difference - at this point, what difference does it make?"

Q: What do you get when one of the walking dead bites a prostitute?
A: A fucking zombie.

- Cynical Pessimist

Hollywood is showing their white male privilege unless they hire a fat, male, Black or Hispanic or Asian to play Barbie.

- Cynical Pessimist

Adolf Hitler was a socialist, vegetarian who hated jews and other minorities and believed in violent suppression of dissenting opinions.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

I just realized why everything the right does drives the left crazy. The left don't have to drive very far to reach crazy because most of them are already there.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

The progressive liberal leftists are so proud of the damage caused by Barack Hussein Obama executive orders including granting citizenship to alien invaders that I think they might appreciate Donald Trump revoking their citizenship.

- Cynical Pessimist

What's the difference between a press pool and a cesspool?
The cesspool stinks less than the press pool.

- Cynical Pessimist

"What difference - at this point, what difference does it make?"

- Cynical Pessimist

"What difference - at this point, what difference does it make?"

- Cynical Pessimist

"My administration will do everything possible to ensure a smooth transition." - Barack Hussein Obama

"If you like your doctor you can keep your doctor. If you like your plan you can keep your plan." - Barack Hussein Obama

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

I think it is a good sign that even God dislikes Hillary enough to piss on one of her election rallies.

- Cynical Pessimist

When you absolutely, positively must destroy any electronic evidence of your crimes. Guaranteed 100% effective against FBI investigations.

I'm Hillary Clinton and I approve this message.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Hillary Clinton's new slogan:
I have caused the deaths of more Americans than Edward Kennedy.

Hillary Clinton's new slogan:
I will do for women what Barack Hussein Obama did for blacks.

Hillary Clinton's new slogan:
Elect me so that Donald Trump won't prosecute me for the crimes that Barack Hussein Obama covered up for me.

- Cynical Pessimist

I'm voting for Hillary Clinton because of her nuanced response to Islamic Terrorists killing American citizens.
"What difference, at this point, what difference does it make?"

I'm voting for Hillary Clinton because giving herself a pardon for her crimes will be another Democratic first.

I'm voting for Hillary Clinton because the world needs to know that Democrats in general, and Hillary Clinton in particular is above the law.

I'm voting for Hillary Clinton because it is important to prove to Americans that no matter how many crimes a democrat commits, she can still become president of the United States.

I'm voting for Hillary Clinton because she has killed more Americans than Teddy Kennnedy.

I'm voting for Hillary Clinton because I feel better about sexual predators like her husband Bill Clinton roaming the halls of the White House than roaming the streets of America.

I'm voting for Hillary Clinton because anyone who can commit as many crimes as she has without being prosecuted deserves the opportunity to see what new crimes she can commit.

I'm voting for Hillary Clinton because anyone who can commit as many crimes as she has without being prosecuted deserves the opportunity to see how many more crimes she can get away with.

- Cynical Pessimist

Evidently the FBI bungled their first coverup and are going back to do it right this time.

- Cynical Pessimist

At the very least, she could become a spokesperson for BleachBit for erasing digital evidence of crimes.

- Cynical Pessimist

She supports their right to be thrown off of buildings in Muslim countries.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

They are visiting every cemetery, even ones that haven't been used in decades to make sure that dead people, no matter how long ago they died, retain their ability to vote.

They are sending voter registrars to every continent on the planet to make sure that anyone who self identifies as an American has the opportunity to vote.

They are going into every library to make sure that no fictional or historical characters are denied their right to vote.

In an effort to be even more inclusive, they are even going into mental health institutions in search of people with multiple personality disorder to make sure that every personality is able to vote.

Remember the motto of Democratic voter registrars:
You Vote Counts, So Vote Early And Vote Often.
Otherwise someone who isn't as moral and honest as we are might win the election.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Because I've also been following the recent presidential election coverage I've been trying to decide who makes a better unreliable narrator for my next novel, a journalist or a politician.

So far I've been unable to catch the main stream media or Hillary Clinton telling the truth.

- Cynical Pessimist

I disagree.

I believe trust the Mass Media is very high.

I trust the media to lie.
I trust they will lie to protect their narrative.
I trust that their culture of dishonesty is so deep, that even when their narrative is not at risk, they will lie.
I trust that the more they lie, the more outrageous their lies will be.

I trust that if the Mass Media ever notice American's reaction to all their lying, that the Mass Media will lie to themselves and everyone else about why the public is getting tired of hearing their lies.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Every patriot who loved, fought and died for America is spinning in their graves so fast the power generated can replace all other energy sources for the next century. The only requirement is for Barack Hussein Obama and the left to keep working to destroy America and they will never have to worry about an energy shortage again.

- Cynical Pessimist

With comments like that, I think her sanity and her detachment from reality are much more serious issues than her physical health.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama has a sign his desk, "Blame Bush, Blame Republicans. It's not my fault."

- Cynical Pessimist

He later mentioned that, like any other requirement, it only applies to republicans. After all, democrats are above the law, and they can't be bothered with responding to the vast right wing conspiracy.

- Cynical Pessimist

To prove her support for diversity, she stood in front of an ISIS flag, and had suicide bombers and other Muslim terrorists stand besider her.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

He constantly had to remind the press that this is not a photo-op. After all, it was only white people that died and nobody cares about them. But if someone took photos of him acting presidential, it could hurt his image with the Islamic Terrorists, Black Lives Matter Terrorists and other core supporters.

- Cynical Pessimist

The bartender said to the white man, "I don't care what you self identify as, we don't serve Anglo-Saxon Americans."

- Cynical Pessimist

The least Barack Hussein Obama could have done is had Air Force One fly over and drop leaflets explaining how much worse this would have been if Bush was still president.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

If he does attend, then he will have attended more intelligence briefings than Barack Hussein Obama did in his full 8 years in the White House.

- Cynical Pessimist

In order to confirm support from their voters, Hillary Clinton and the Democratic Party will be giving out beheading swords, suicide bomber vests and automatic weapons to anyone who votes for Hillary two or more times.

- Cynical Pessimist

Heil Hillary.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama who said, "the Affordable Care Act will reduce insurance premiums, the private sector is doing fine, if you like your plan, you can keep it, you didn't build that, I didn't know about the NSA spying, I will create shovel ready jobs, Benghazi was caused by a youtube video, I didn't know the IRS was targeting conservative groups, ..." wants everyone to belive that an airplane loaded with pallets full of small denomination unmarked bills and delivered to terrorists holding Americans hostage was NOT payment of ransom. He wants everyone to believe it was just a concidence that the hostages were released immediately after the ransom was paid.

What liberal could possibly question that?

- Cynical Pessimist

I'm wondering why Barack Hussein Obama is so upset. Hands down Barack Hussein Obama is the most unfit president the United States has ever had. I don't think Donald Trump can take that accoplishment away from Barack Hussein Obama.

Considering that the American people, including illegal aliens, convicted criminals, dead and fictional characters voted for Barack Hussein Obama, it is unlikely that Donald Trump can match that accomplishment.

Once you've elected Barack Hussein Obama, a community organizer who hates America, hates Americans, hates cops, hates white people, hates rich people, ... and supports Muslims who oppress women, and kill gays and infidels, I don't see how the left can have any problem voting for Donald Trump.

However, their real reason for not voting for Donald Trump is because he loves America.

- Cynical Pessimist

Her statement continued, "We will do everything in our power to increase the security on our servers so that we won't have to apologize in the future for anything we may say or do when slandereing and trash talking about people who disgust us..

- Cynical Pessimist

If you want the mainstream media long enough you will begin to realize their unstated motto is "unfair and unbalanced" which applies not only to their reporting, but their news readers and commentators.

- Cynical Pessimist

For the second night of the convention she had mothers of thugs who were killed committing crimes speak. To make sure that her followers understood her nuanced position, afterwards she led the crowd in chanting, "Black Lives Matter," "What do we want? Dead Cops. When do we want them? Now!," and "Pigs in a blanket, fry them like bacon."

When she and her advisors looked at the poll numbers the following day, they were stunned to discover that her popularity was sliding with law abiding citizens who have jobs and work to support their families.

- Cynical Pessimist

Is it any wonder that she is supported by more Islamic terrorists than any other American politician? They even call her Jihadi Jill.

- Cynical Pessimist

Maybe it's time for her to have a new theme song. I suggest, "Poor Poor Pitiful Me"

- Cynical Pessimist

When one of the press dared to contradict the president and explain that the attacker used an axe and a knife, Barack Hussein Obama replied that didn't change the facts that guns are dangerous. pointing out that the attacker was shot with a gun. Barack Hussein Obama also immediately stopped the press conference and told his minons that the reporter that questioned him could not be a real reporter and must never be allowed back into a press conference again.

- Cynical Pessimist

More than 90 people were killed and more than 200 people were injured.

The fact that people were killed and injured by a Muslim shouting Allahu Akbar didn't bother Barack Hussein Obama. What bothered him was that he wasn't sure how to respond to an attack when he couldn't blame the slaughter on white people, guns and the NRA.

- Cynical Pessimist

It was also revealed that when approached, the killer was chanting "Pigs in a blanket, fry them like bacon," and "What do we want? Dead Cops. When do we want them? Now."

Barack Hussein Obama has promised that as soon as the FBI and Department of Justice finish whitewashing Hillary Clinton's federal crime spree, they won't rest until they find a YouTube video to blame for this unfortunate incident and are concerned that the motives of the killer may never be known.

- Cynical Pessimist

When someone that Barack Hussein Obama doesn't consider a reporter and who he subquently banned from any future press conference asked why Barack Hussein Obama doesn't admit that his entire hate filled devisive government has made life worse for minorities he responded, "I'm Barack Hussein Obama. I don't make mistakes."

- Cynical Pessimist

It seems that the members of the peaceful protest group, Black Lives Matter, were walking down the street carrying automatic weapons and chanting "Pigs in a blanket, fry them like bacon" or "What do we want? Dead Cops. When do we want it? Now." when they accidentally crossed paths with a group of peaceful Muslim protestors wearing suicide bomber vests, carrying automatic weapons and swords while chanting "Death to America, Death to Americans."

A number of weapons went off, and the news media weren't sure how to coverup the incident or how to blame guns or white Americans for the innocent lose of lives of the peaceful protestors.

- Cynical Pessimist

Elect Hillary Clinton so that Donald Trump won't prosecute me for the crimes that Barack Hussein Obama covered up for me.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama was quick to contradict the Russian President by saying "American is proof that a county can be successful by not defending it's borders, by forcing the working class to support the welfare class and bringing in workplace violence perpetrators to reduct the number of unemployed citizens asking for jobs and health care."

- Cynical Pessimist

"I want to send a particular message to the almost one million Europeans living in London, who make a huge contribution to our city - working hard, paying taxes, slaughtering infidels, suporting global jihad, and contributing to our civic and cultural life." said London's Muslim mayor Sadiq Khan. "You are welcome here. We value the enormous contribution you make to our city and that will not change as a result of this referendum."

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama has created a new holiday for our Muslim friends, Slaughter Your Infidel Co-Worker Day. Because Barack Hussein Obama wants to be inclusive, any Muslim who doesn't have a job or who works for a company that doesn't have any infidels or gays to kill, can walk down the street with their suicide vests and beheading swords until they find a bus, school or shopping center deserving of their attention.

- Cynical Pessimist

Dan Savage is the real enemy of the LGBT community because he supports the rights of the Muslims to kill everyone in the LGBT community.

Evidently he doesn't like some of the words that Donald Trump uses.

He evidently never heard the phrase, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me"

I think we need to rephrase it so even someone as evil and stupid as Dan Savage can understand.

"Muslims with swords, stones and tall buildings may kill the members of LGBT community by beheading them, stoning them and throwing them off of tall buildings, but words hurt a lot less."

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

If Barack Hussein Obama was president during World War II he would NOT allow this country to decalre war on the Germans, Italians or Japanese because that would be unfair to the majority of their citizens who were not currently active in the military.

- Cynical Pessimist

After the slaughter of 50 gays, and wounding of 49 gays, Donald Trump promised to stand with gays and protect them from bullets from Islamic Extremists.

As a liberal democrat you have no choice, You must vote for Hillary Clinton. The injuries and deaths of more than 100 gays is a small price to pay to protect Muslims from hate speech.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama will be bringing in 2,000 military aged male Muslim refugees a day and providing them with infidel beheading swords, suicide bomber vests and Qurans.

- Cynical Pessimist

How can you tell if someone is a liberal?
He tells you that Islam is the religion of peace and you shouldn't disrespect the 1% of Muslims because of the things the other 99% do.

- Cynical Pessimist

Then I guess if he was president during World War II he wouldn't call the European killers of Jews and other undesirables Nazis or Germans, or call the Far Eastern attackers Japanese or ...

After all, in the world according to Barack Hussein Obama it is so much easier to defeat an enemy if you describe them incorrectly and misidentify them.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

However, Hillary Clinton said it is perfectly reasonable to declare war on republicans any time it can't be proved that a Muslim terrorist was the slaughterer of masses of otherwise defenseless people.

She also saw no problem on declaring war on on any other minority or majority who disagrees with her support of bringing more Muslim terrorists into America.

- Cynical Pessimist

For some reason, Hillary Clinton didn't say that not all members of the KKK lynch minorities and that we shouldn't blame the majority for the actions of a small minority.

For some reason, Hillary Clinton didn't say that not all Nazis kill their inferiors and that we shouldn't blame the majority for the actions of a small minority.

I guess that means that if a Muslim slaughters gays, rapes females, abuses women, ... that is acceptable to her.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama, giggled, smiled and went on to say, "Just because I am putting the full might and support of the United States Government and the Department of Justice behind Hillary Clinton's run for president, that doesn't mean that we won't see Social Justice done."

- Cynical Pessimist

Hillary Clinton ought to know about holding women in low regard because her opinion of women is even lower that Donald Trump's.

Hillary Clinton thinks that we need to believe any woman who reports a rape, unless that woman is accusing her husband. In that case, Hillary leads the charge to smear and defame the accuser.

After all, Hillary Clinton is the one who takes campaign contributions from Muslim leaders of Muslim countries where it is acceptable to kill women who have been raped, where women aren't allowed to leave their home unless accompanied by an adult male relative, where it is considered acceptable to own female slaves and abuse any woman who dares to contradict anything any man says or does, where buying a bunch of 10 year old girls to be wives is acceptable, where it is possible to have a serious discussion about why women shouldn't be taught to read or write, ....

Yup. We need to vote for Hillary Clinton because she is a female. After all, that is a major accomplishment which makes her deserving to be president of the United States. Who coul possibly argue with that logic?

- Cynical Pessimist

85% of Democrates said yes
54% of Replublicans said yes.
100% of Muslims said yes.
17% of Muslims wanted to kill anyone who didn't say yes.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

No wait. That makes no sense. You can't blame women for provoking their own rapes.

Instead he said that Donald Trump is responsible for the rioters and looters who show up at his rallies and attack peacful attendees and the police trying to protect the peaceful attendees..

That makes much more sense.

At least to the left wing wackos that are ruining the United States of America.

- Cynical Pessimist

Hillary knows this from personal experience because she is the most unfit person on the planet to ever run for president of the United States. Considering that her major competitor for the prize of most unfit person to ever run for president, she even manages to beat out Barack Hussein Obama who is monumentally unfit.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

She protects the rights of women to be assaulted and reped by her husband, Bill Clinton and any other high level Democrats.

- Cynical Pessimist

As the biggest loose canon in politics in the entire history of the United States of America she might know what she is talking about.

- Cynical Pessimist

Evidently Barbara Boxer, a leading intellectual in the Democratic Party, can't understand why the majority of the Democratic Party supporters who are encouraged or paid to use violence and intimidation to protest Republicans events are using the same tactics at the Democratic events when they are not happy with the outcome.

- Cynical Pessimist

In other news, a researcher in Germany found a cache of documents from World War II concentration camp commanders asking how they could make the vacationers in their camps more comfortable. The documents explained how they weren't allow the segregation of people by race or religion. The commanders were looking forward to the final solution that would make their guests an important part of German history.

- Cynical Pessimist

The police response was immediate, they held a press conference. The stated that even though they hadn't even started an investigation, they were sure these were not terrorists attacks because terrorists never use knives.

The reporters were careful not to ask about the hundreds of knife attacks against Jews and other infidels in Israel and other places by peaceful moderate Muslims who have been taught since childhood that killing Jews and infidels is the duty of all faithful Muslims.

- Cynical Pessimist

In response, Hillary Clinton stated that once Bernie Sanders is paid hundreds of thousands of dollars for speeches to Wall Street companies and releases transcripts of those speeches then she will release transcripts of her speeches.

After all, what could be fairer than that?

- Cynical Pessimist

The Left:
I don't celebrate Columbus Day because I don't celebrate criminals ... unless they fit the narrative.

Christopher Columbus:
The only illegal alien Democrats hate.

Scientists pretty sure antisemitism virus comes from bats and definately not leaked by liberal antisemitic institutions.

Harvard student leaves lecture on microaggressions to attend "Kill The Jews" rally.
- Babylon Bee

A lot of universities probably spend too much money on football, but I think Harvard should spend more money on fotball and less on pro-Holocaust glee clugs.
- IowaHawkBlog

Wacky college fads thru the4 years:
1930s: swallowing goldfish
1950s:panty raids and stuffing phone booths
1970s: streaking
2020s: Nuremberg-style pro-Holocaust pep rallies.
- IowaHawkBlog

Don't seperate illegal alien families!
Do the humane thing!
Deport the entire family!

Democrat Logic:
Anything a woman can do , a man can do better ... Just ask a transgender.

Up until 1913 Americans kept all of their earnings.
Despite this, America still had schools, roads, collees, vast railroads, subways and an army and navy.
Tell me again why taxes are necessary?

Support Hillary Clinton. She will win because she is too big to fail and too big to jail.

- Cynical Pessimist

She continued, "That is why I am following President Obama's lead and blaming whites for racism because it is in their DNA, and blaming the wealthy for taking more than their fair share, blaming cops for hating blacks, blaming men for oppressing women, and blaming the non-violent Christians and Jews for getting upset every time a Muslim kills one of them."

- Cynical Pessimist

Bernie Sanders is saying that Hillary Clinton is unqualified to be president.

I agree with both of them. Neither is qualified to be president of the United States.

- Cynical Pessimist

The N.Y.Slimes and Washington Compost both ran editorials complaining that it is pointless to investigate a Democrat when only Republicans should be punished for committing crimes.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

The new Super Saver package is for those people who can't afford a trip to Europe, but after their death and their cremation would like their ashes to be spread in Europe.

For people who can only afford a one way ticket to Europe, the airlines will arrange to have your entrails spread around Europe. You have your choice of having your entrails spread in your favorite city (Paris, Brussels, ..) and at your favorite events (sporting, concerts, ...).

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Maybe she is running for president of the wrong country. I'd be happy to see her receive the fair and balanced treatment that all women receive under Islamic rule.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama danced the tango while Islamic terrorists killed men, women and children.

- Cynical Pessimist

He just refuses to act in an Islamaphobic fashion when he knows that all Muslims are not terrorists.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama also explained to young people that that when choosing between poison and health food they should try both. You should just decide what works.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

I think I understand the news readers position.

If the deaths of innocents causes the "right wing" to take control of the government, then the government instead of encouraging the slaughter of innocents by importing extremists who slaughter innocents but don't represent the "religion of peace," will try to prevent the slaughter of innocents by the non-representatives of the "religion of peace."

If that happens, the news readers would feel very silly starting each news broadcast explaining that Islam is a religion of peace when there isn't any slaughter of innocents that they don't need to cover up for.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

The Democratic Party believes that it is unfair to prevent foreigners, criminals, dead people and fictious characters from voting in American elections.

The Democratic Party believes that if you didn't vote more than one time for the democratic platform, then is something wrong with you.

I agree with them, however I would go one step further. I believe that that whether you vote only once or if you vote many times for the democratic platform, there is something wrong with you.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

While on the campaign trail, Presidential contender Hillary Clinton took time out from her busy scheduled to console the grieving relatives by first proclaiming that this death was caused by a YouTube video, and later saying, "What difference, at this point, what difference does it make?"

- Cynical Pessimist

Ever since the Nazis and KKK became splinter groups of Islam, the Progressive Liberals have a problem. Since the Progressive Liberals support Islam, they can no longer call everyone they dislike racist or compare them to Hitler as bad things because the goals of the Nazis and the KKK are the same as the goals of Islam and they don't want to offend the Muslims.

- Cynical Pessimist

Now they want you to vote for Hillary Clinton to prove that America is misogynistic.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

As all DemoCraps know, blacks and other minorities are so ignorant, stupid, worthless ... etc that they are incapable of obtaining a photo ID, even though the DemoCraps are doing their best to hand out IDs to illegal aliens and anything that breathes, claim that requiring a photo ID will prevent many registered DemoCraps from voting.

But like all DemoCraps, he is using the Obama-Clinton fact challenged, truth deficit, factually incorrect, fact free, disingenuous, misspoken, unclear to smear his opponents.

The only DemoCraps that photo ID will prevent from voting, is the dead, foreigners, cartoon and other fictional characters who are the core voting demographic of the DemoCrap party.

- Cynical Pessimist

It is a lie that she cares about those people. If she cared about them she wouldn't require IDs to attend any of her rallies.

I don't know if asking for voter IDs will prevent any legal citizens from voting (however, I doubt that many will be prevented from voting), I do know that voter IDs will prevent the Democrat core demographic from voting; foreigners, dead people, cartoon and other fictional characters.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

I need to stop right here and define my terms.

In order to be considered to be a great progressive-liberal thinker you must have the inability to tell the truth, the inability to recognize the results of your actions, the inability to think clearly, the inability to to be loyal to your followers, and the ability to slander anyone who disagrees with anything that you say.

Now where was I?

Now that I've defined progressive-liberal thinkers, there isn't any point in refuting their illogical, nonsensical rhetoric.

After all, anyone who arrives at their position without benefit of logical rational thought can not be argued out of their position by logical rational thought.

- Cynical Pessimist

Using their logic (if you can call what they do as thinking), I propose that the Democratic / Liberal / Progressive / Socialist / Fascist Party nominate Charlie Manson for President of the United States. Electing him will give their party the honor of having the first felon for President of the United States. According to their intellectual leaders (if their zombie sheeple followers are actually capable of following anything that complicated), it doesn't matter their candidate did in the past, but what he can do for them in the future.

Since Charlie Manson wants revolution and a race war in America, that makes his goals the same as the Democratic / Liberal / Progressive / Socialist / Fascist Party so it makes sense to select him as their candidate.

Helter Skelter.

- Cynical Pessimist

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- Cynical Pessimist

He further explained that when Democrats did the same exact thing in 2007, refused to vote for President Bush's nomination to the Supreme Court, that didn't count. After all, everyone knows that all Democrats are corrupt party hacks that will do anything to promote their agenda of destroying the United States of America which is entirely acceptable to the elite democrat ruling class struggling to preserve their morally bankrupt position above the law.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

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What could be more patriotic than that?

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

I agree.

Hillary Clinton has more experienced than Bernie Sanders.
- in allowing Americans to die while on her watch.
- in covering up a foreign threat to protect the Barack Hussein Obama narrative that the war on terrorism has been won.
- in lying to the American people so that the deaths of Americans wouldn't interrupt Barack Hussein Obama's campaign for reelection to the Presidentof the United States.
Yes, Hillary Clinton has more experience than Bernie Sanders. However, I'm not sure that is the kind of experience we want in a president.

- Cynical Pessimist

Analysts have stated that this is one promise she won't be able to break because if she continues supporting Barack Hussein Obama's economic plan there won't be any middle class left to tax.

- Cynical Pessimist

After all, when you give someone money, you never expect anything in return.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Later that same day, spokesmen for Russia, China, North Korea, Cuba and al-Qaeda held a joint press conference announcing their support for Hillary Clinton for President and stating how happy they have been reading her email and how they look forward to reading her email for the next eight years.

- Cynical Pessimist

I now have no choice about who to vote for in the 2016 election to maintain my progressive liberal bonafides.

To prove I am not a sexist, I will need to vote for Hillary Clinton, even after she is indicted for federal crimes, to prove that a bribe taking law breaking progressive liberal who hates America is more deserving of the presidency that any Republican who cares about America and the safety of the American people.

- Cynical Pessimist

In a similiar vein, Barack Hussein Obama wonders why there is more anti-semitism now than when he took office.

It hasn't occured to Barack Hussein Obama that announcing there is no such thing as Islamic Terrorists, that all killers of Jews are random gun nuts, cutting a deal to fund the largest terrorist organization in the world (that hates Jews) and put the terrorists on the path to obtaning nuclear weapons, that it might cause people to agree with Barack Hussein Obama that the only Jewish Solution (kill all Jews) is the one that Nazis created and that is written in the Koran and thus has the support of the whole Muslim world.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

He did manage to find a bright side to the increasing hatred towards all blacks and Muslims caused by his constant denial of the wrongdoing by any of them.

Barack Hussein Obama is pleased that racial relations are better today than they were after the Civil War. That period when the Democratic Party created the KKK to intimidate and kill recently freed slaves. That period when gun control laws were enacted so that the KKK would have an easier time intimidating and killing blacks.

Yup. Blacks are so much better off now than immediately after the Civil War. Yet another accomplishment that Barack Hussein Obama can be proud of.

- Cynical Pessimist

The Democratic Mayor and other elected Democratic official were incredibly mad that after throwing every roadblock in the path of Walmart opening two stores, including the city plans for raising the minimum wage by 1/3, Walmart has has finally caved to official pressure and is cancelling their plans to build two more stores.

The Mayor and the other elected officials held a press conference to announce that they will do everything in their power to force Walmart to open the two stores as originally planned before the Mayor and city council changed the economic environment to make sure that Walmart would be unable to make a profit at those locations. The Mayor and other elected officials stated that "Walmart promised to open those stores and just because we changed the terms of the contract is no reason for them to cancel the contract. After all, the government wastes money all the time and nobody ever gets upset about that. Nobody was uspet when Barack Hussein Obama lied to Americans that they could keep their doctors and plans under the Unaffordable Care Act."

- Cynical Pessimist

In the interest of fairness, I would like to misinterpet his position as hateful towards white males and anyone else who has a job and pays taxes so that illigal immigrants can run across the border and apply for welfare.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

All you need to remember is that banning law abiding citizens from owning guns will not stop criminals from acquiring guns. And not all of his followers use guns. Some of them behead infidels with swords or blow them up with pressure cooker bombs which Barack Hussein Obama has no intention of banning.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

I suspect anyone married to Bill Clinton would feel the same way.

- Cynical Pessimist

She claims that she is fighting inequality in pay for women by paying women staffers less than her male staffers.

She claims that she is fighting rape cultrue by believing every false claim of rape while ignoring the charges and demonizing the women who were assaulted and raped by her husband, Bill Clinton.

She claims that she is protected Americans by ignoring the more than 600 emails she received from Ambassador Stevens requesting additional security, not objecting to the order to stand down when Americans could have stepped in and saved the lives of the Ambassador and instead surfed the internet looking for videos to blame for the slaughter of Americans.

Yup. That is the kind of hope and change we need after Barack Hussein Obama.

- Cynical Pessimist

He explained how he believes that anyone desiring to own a gun is obviously a mental defective subhuman. Since those kinds of people shouldn't be allowed to own a gun, he will be making an executive order to change the Affordable Care Act to make it impossible for those kinds of evil, wicked mean and nasty people to ever own a gun.

He then complained he doesn't understand why any of those evil subhuman monsters are unwilling to debate him.

- Cynical Pessimist

He than explained that he was more than willing to debate any cracker redneck racist that was willing to step up and try to dispute him.

- Cynical Pessimist

The White House spokesperson was quick to say their analysis indicates it was not an H-Bomb.

Keep in mind that this same administration told us that the slaughter of 4 American citizens in Benghazi was a simple protest about a YouTube video.

The same administration that told us that if we liked our doctors and insurance plans we could keep them.

The same administration that told us that even though the person slaughtering Americans was shouting Allahu Akbar, those were not terrorist attacks, but cases of workplace violence.

I'm beginning to think North Korea has the H-Bomb.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

I don't understand his position.

White-people took responsibility for Donald Trump in the same way that the black-people took responsibility for the rioting and looting in the town of Ferguson after both the local and federal government were unable to find any grounds to railroad an innocent policeman for doing his duty in protecting the citizens from a black thug.

- Cynical Pessimist

The other 60% disagree and say there is no war and that whatever happens is the is the will of Allah.

- Cynical Pessimist

He continued, saying that the Republican response to the slaughter of infidels in France and America will only lead to fueling hate towards peace loving Muslims.

- Cynical Pessimist

Since he didn't want to slight the Black Lives Matter crowd he released a list of tunes he really listens to so they would know he is on their side.

AC4 - Fuck The Pigs
Afflicted - Here Come The Cops
Agnostic Front - Police State
Agrotoxico - Fascistas Fardados (Uniformed Facists)
Alkaline Trio - Cop
GG Allin - Kill The Police
Anti-Flag - Fuck Police Brutality
Anti-Flag - Police State In The U.S.A
Anti-Flag - I'm Being Watched By The C.I.A
Anti-Flag - Police Story
Bastard Squad - Die Pig Die
Black Flag - Police Story
Body Count - Cop Killer
Cap A Capo - Wannabe Police Scum
Casualties - Morality Police
Casualties - Fuck Police Brutality
Clash - Police On My Back
Clash - Police and Thieves
Clash - Know Your Rights
Clash - Guns of Brixton
Cockney Rejects - Sitting In A Cell
Cocksparrer - Riot Squad
D.R.I. - Busted
Dead Kennedys' - Police Truck
Daycare Swndlers - Rambo Cop
Dicks - Dicks Hate the Police
Dicks - Pigs Run Wild
Dicks - The Police (Force)
Discharge - Pigs
Disorder - Police Poem / Police State
Doom - Police Bastard
Dope - Fuck The Police
Exploited - Cop Cars
Exploited - Police Shit
Exploited - Police Brutality
Fartz - Police Force
Frenzal Rhomb - Who'd Be A Cop
Leftover Crack - One Dead Cop
Millions of Dead Cops (MDC) - Dead Cops
Millions of Dead Cops (MDC) - No More Cops
Millions of Dead Cops (MDC) - Police Related Death
Millions of Dead Cops (MDC) - Let's Kill All The Cops
Necros - Police Brutality
NOFX - Cops & Donuts
Offspring - L.A.P.D
Oxblood - Police
Partisans - Bastard In Blue
Really Red - Pigboy
Screeching Weasel - Police Insanity
Slightly Stupid - Fuck The Police
Slime - Bullenschweine (Cop-Pigs)
Spitting On Cops - Cops Should Be Killed
SSD - Police Beat
Suicidal Tendencies - Fascist Pig
TSOL - Anticop
UK Subs - Police State
Unseen - Police Brutality
Urban Waste - Police Brutality
Viscious Circle - Police Brutality
White Lie - Peace Officer
Wingnut Diishwashers Union - Fuck Every Cop (Who Ever Did His Job)

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama held a press conference and immediately explained that we mustn't blame sll Muslims for the actions of a rogue individual and this proves that we need stronger gun control to prevent this kind of slaughter.

When he found out that it wasn't a Muslim and it wasn't a white man who could be blamed for the incident, he told his press agent to not to rush to judgement as it makes Barack Hussein Obama regime look bad.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Fortunately for America, Barack Hussein Obama at that time recognized that individuals claiming to be Islamit Terrorists and shouting "Allahu Akbar" while killing unarmed men, women and children are simply perpetrators of workplace violence and proof that we must protect the safety of our citizens by disarming them and preventy them from accidently shooting someone while they are being killed.

- Cynical Pessimist

He was quoted as saying, "Hate speech must be reserved for the use by liberals or it has no value at all."

He also endorsed Barack Hussein Obama's claim that all white people had racism in their DNA, all cops are racist killers and other comtemptable lies spewed from the left wing propagandists.

- Cynical Pessimist

He later said that he was taken out of context and that it was only a joke.

If you are offended at the following, then you have taken it out of context and that it was intended as a joke.

I want Barack Hussein Obama to have the same success as Abraham Lincoln (the 16th President), James A. Garfield (the 20th President), William McKinley (the 25th President) and John F. Kennedy (the 35th President).

- Cynical Pessimist

I'd like to do them one better and support post birth abortion.

I'd like to start with Barack Hussein Obama and then go after the rest of his supporters.

- Cynical Pessimist

Unfortunately for the Islamic Terrorist supporting Democrats and their leader Barack Hussein Obama, the Islamic Terrorists in San Bernardino were NOT on the No Fly list, and they didn't buy the guns themselves. They were given guns by other Islamic Terrorist supporters who weren't on the list.

In addition, the female Islamic Terrorist was passed by the Department of Homeland Security as not being a threat to America.

Yup. I can see the government has this problem under control. Don't you feel better now?

- Cynical Pessimist

She replied, "Bill Clinton has experience with interviewing and managing female interns."

- Cynical Pessimist

I guess that means I have to support human rights the way the Muslims do.
I'll have to slaughter gays and subjugate women.

- Cynical Pessimist

Since Tom Brokaw is so fond of comparisons, I'd like to compare Tom Brokaw to Joseph Goebbels, Adolf Hitlers minister of propaganda. After all, because of his comparisson it is obvious that Tom Borkaw has no interest in telling the truth.

- Cynical Pessimist

I think I understand his point.

In keeping with the spirit of his suggestion, I'd like to offer him a compromise. I think that since he believes that the bill of rights needs to be updated to take away my right to own a gun, I think the Bill of Rights needs to be updated to take away his right to free speech.

Fair is fair.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama ought to know what makes a person unift to be president because everything he has done since becoming president is designed to destroy the United States proves he is unfit to be president.

- Cynical Pessimist

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Barack Hussein Obama, from behind the security of fences (which protect the White House but can't possibly protect our border) and armed guards (although Americans who can't afford armed guards shouldn't be allowed to own guns to protect themselves), once again assured the American public that we have nothing to worry about from the perpetrators of workplace violence in Paris and San Bernardino. Once he solves the global climate and lack of jobs these bumps in the road to peace will be eliminated. After all, Barack Hussein Obama won the war on the people (who can not be named) in time to win his re-election. They are the Junior Varsity team and they are contained.

Barack Hussein Obama went on to state that even though our apologetic approach has convinced millions of moderate Muslims that the extremists are correct and that they will take over the world and kill all non-Muslims, we must continue our successful policy of appeasement because.

Barack Hussein Obama also wanted us to remember that Tashfeen Malik, one of the workplace violence perpetrators that killed 14 Americans and numberous others in San Bernadino, was vetted by DHS and therefore can't be a terrorist.

Barack Hussein Obama ended his press conference by restating his position, that welcoming Islamic Terrorists pretending to be Syrian refugees and apologizing for every action by every Christian since the death of Christ will surely bring the global Caliphate that all right thinking Americans must surely want.

- Cynical Pessimist

Yup.

But don't worry. Even if a terrorist was dumb enough to obey the Gun-Free zones that Hillary wants, they can still bring their stabbing knives, beheading swords, pressure cooker bombs and every other killing device known to man. After all, Hillary is so busy that she probably won't have time to put up Suicide-Bomber Free Zone, Beheading-Free Zone, or Murder Infidel Pigs-Free Zone signs.

Fortuantely for her, even if she does outlaw all killing devices, thus making the rest of the country a target rich environment for the terrorists, she will still have her personal armed bodyguards to protect her.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

The right has determined that of those activists pretending to be climate scientists, 99% of them are willing to proclaim the earth is flat if they are paid a similar amount of money. The 1% of them that refused to proclaim the earth is flat for any amount of money, were convinced that their tin foil hats were preventing the pollsters from reading their minds.

- Cynical Pessimist

Just like Barack Hussein Obama explained when he said we can negotiate with Iranian people who shout "Death To America" because they are peaceful people and that is just a friendly greeting among themselves.

- Cynical Pessimist

People who fear Islamic Terrorists believe a more truthful comparison is Spike Lee is like Joseph Gobbels, Adolf Hitler's Minister of Propaganda who's outrageous lies were believed and supported by all the left thinking socialists/liberals/democrats.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama drew a line in the sand and issued a stern warning to the President of France, Francois Hollande, to not give in to Isamophobia when Climate Change is the real threat that must be fought.

- Cynical Pessimist

Most Americans think Barack Hussein Obama is the modern Adolf Hitler planning genocide against everyone who disagrees with him.

- Cynical Pessimist

Afterwards he complained to his toadies and sycophants that it was difficult finding that letter among the millions of letters opposing his policy.

- Cynical Pessimist

He seemed unconcerned that Barack Hussein Obama's rhetoric is turning Americans against Barack Hussein Obama and his Muslim followers.

- Cynical Pessimist

Aside from the hundreds of relatives weeping and protesting his speech, the press was unable to find anyone who disagreed with the president.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Most Americans think he has been a jerk since before he was elected to any political office.

Nicolle Wallace doesn't understand why he can't tap into his humanity to reassure the American people that they are safe from Islamic Terrorist acts.

Let me explain it so that even a propaganda spouter employed by the biased left wing media can understand.

Those creators of workplace violence, or justified political protests (Barack Hussein Obama is incapable of saying Islamic Terrorist) are random events that no one needs be concerned about. Even if you want to use stronger unfriendly terms for the life stoppers, those people are the JV team and they are contained. Barack Hussein Obama ran for reelection and won on basis that the war on those icky nasty events had been won, so he can't contradict his narrative. Therefore there is no need to talk about it any more.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama then said, "Nobody who sets foot in America goes through more screening than refugees. Just ask the millions of refugees that walk across our southern border. If you can find them."

- Cynical Pessimist

However.

He wants them to goosestep and salute his genius.

He doesn't want them to think about why disarming law abiding citizens would make them safer from armed criminals.

He doesn't want them to think about why law abiding citizens don't deserve to own guns, but via his "Fast and Furious" program Mexican gangsters who slaughtered over 300 innocent unarmed victims deserved to own guns.

He doesn't want them to think about why every agency in the United States needs SWAT teams, including:
- the Department of Agriculture
- the Railroad Retirement Board
- the Tennessee Valley Authority
- the Office of Personnel Management
- the Consumer Product Safety Commission
- the Department of Education
- the Food and Drug Administration
- the Internal Revenue Service
- the Environmental Protection Agency
- the Wisconsin Department of Natural Resources
- the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration
- the National Fish and Wild Life Service
- the National Park Service
- the Deparment of Education
- the Department of Energy
- the Education Department Inspector General
but you don't need guns.

- Cynical Pessimist

To put that in perspective, Barack Hussein Obama also stated:
You can keep your insurance / doctor if you want to.
Benghazi was a spontaneous protest by AK-47 and rocket launcher carrying protestors inspired by a YouTube video.
The day before Islamist terrorists attacked and killed more than 120 and injured more than 350 in France, Barack Hussein Obama proclaimed that ISIS is the J.V. team, they are contained and are no longer a threat.

- Cynical Pessimist

My take on why the left wants this to happen is that their heads are so far up their asses they think that the Muslims won't be able to behead them.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

None of the Princeton student members of Black Lies Matter see anything wrong with demanding a segregated place on campus that only Black students are allowed to enter.

- Cynical Pessimist

By lying to the public about a YouTube video being the cause of death of four Americans in Benghazi and still being the Democratic presidental candidate Hillary has proved that Democratic women have equality with Democratic men in their ability to dodge responsibility for their actions.

By breaking the Federal Espionage Act among others, Hillary has proved that high level Democratic women have equality with Democratic men in their ability to evade punishment for their crimes.

By accepting large contributions from 3rd world dictators of countries where women are treated like 3rd class citizens Hillary has proved that Democratic women have equality with Demoratic men when it comes to pretending to support womens rights while supporting those who don't believe in womens rights.

By paying her female staffers less than her male staffers, Hillary has proved that Democratic women have equalty with Democratic men in oppressing women and not being held accountable for her actions.

By staying with and supporting a husband who continually has sex with other women, Hillary has proved that being a doormat for man doesn't stop her from being considered a example for women to emulate.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

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To show that Barack Hussein Obama believe that the JV team is contained he released 5 terrorist from Guantanamo Bay prison the day after the attack.

- Cynical Pessimist

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He is right if you ignore the suicide vests and the ak-47s used to slaughter the non-Muslims.

- Cynical Pessimist

I now call progressive / liberal / marxist / socialist / democrat libturds.
As in shit for brains because what they are is entirely self-inflicted.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Put the cunt in Country.

- Cynical Pessimist

He continued, "You shouldn't allow this bump on the road to peace to influence you to close your borders to hundreds of thousands of military aged men who are entering your country as refugees. In our global world, allowing in a few hundred people who don't represent the peaceful Muslim religion is a small price to pay to help the unfortunate people who need our help."

- Cynical Pessimist

The Muslim City Council announced that they do not plan on making any changes. They will continue to treat Christians and Jews the same as ISIS/ISIL does.

- Cynical Pessimist

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Barack Hussein Obama and the Democrats are upset because they thought they had set the precedent that all politicians must lie all the time.

- Cynical Pessimist

A Democratic Socialist makes as much sense as healthy poison or rapist that supports feminists.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Donald Trump was going to call Barack Hussein Obama a Muslim Marxist but realized that Barack Hussein Obama would consider that a compliment.

- Cynical Pessimist

I don't know whether to be impressed that Hillary Clinton held the office of Secretary of State for years and NEVER sent Barack Hussein Obama an email, or appalled that Barack Hussein Obama paid so little attention to his emails that he NEVER noticed that she was breaking a federal law by not using an official secure government email address.

- Cynical Pessimist

Since it isn't racist or hateful for an article in Esquire Online to say, "Please Punch This Man in the Dick (and display a picture of Bobby Jindal),"
I'd just like to use the same level of liberal intellectual discourse as Esquire Online and say, "Please Punch This Man in the Dick (and display a picture of Barack Hussein Obama)."

Since it isn't racist or hateful for a University of Pennsylvania religious-studies professor and a frequent MSNBC guest to say that Ben Carson deserves a ‘coon of the year’ award,
I'd just like to use the same level of liberal intellectual discourse as the University of Pennsylvania religious-studies professor and a frequent MSNBC guest to say, "Barack Hussein Obama deserves a ‘coon of the year’ award.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

What he didn't say, but did imply, is that he is only referring to the Republican candidates.

Which leaves the obvious, most of the morons still left are the Democrat candidates running for president. After all, Biden and most Democrats support supplying Iran with the ability to fund terrorism and develop nuclear weapons. Iran is a Muslim nation where they don't have any homophobes because they execute all homosexuals.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

The correct response, is "Easy. The same way you told us with a straight face that with the Affordable Care Act we could keep our insurance and doctors if we liked them."

- Cynical Pessimist

To support his executive order, Barack Hussein Obama ordered surveys to determine if any of the existing VA patients had any complaints about about the quality of their care.

Barack Hussein Obama beamed with pride and joy when they were unable to find any patients with complaints.

Barack Hussein Obama ignored the fact that the survey was unable to find anyone who survived long enough to answer the questions.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama agrees and didn't let that stop him from signing a deal (not a treaty) that gives the Iranian people the go ahead to develop nuclear devices to use against Christians, Jews, Americans and other infidels.

I guess that means that if we chant "Death to Barack Hussein Obama," he shouldn't take it personally either.

- Cynical Pessimist

A Republican think tank press conference responded that they must take his comments seriously. After all, Barack Hussein Obama is an expert in unpatriotic platforms because there is no one less patriotic than he is.

- Cynical Pessimist

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If the stupid Americans that needed their health insurance forced on them believe that, then using the Barack Hussein Obama revisionist version of the truth we need to absolve his mentor, Adolf Hitler, because there is 'not a smidgen of evidence' of his Anti-Semitism either.

- Cynical Pessimist

Upon hearing the news, Barack Hussein Obama held a press conference on the golf course where he was playing to state that if he had a son that that son would look like Shannon J. Miles. Barack Hussein Obama went on to state that arresting Shannon J. Miles is a gross miscarriage of justice and that Black Lives Matter. Barack Hussein Obama insisted that the Department of Justice would investigate the officer and his department for racism and punish any of them found guilty. Barack Hussein Obama then expressed concern for trying to take the guns from all citizens when he is really concerned with only taking the guns from whites who have racism in their DNA. Barack Hussein Obama restated that it is tragic when a black man needs to protect himself that he needs to empty a full clip into a racist cop.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

The server, which was stored in a bathroom closet, was wiped because it is normal to wipe before leaving the bathroom.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

I'm offended that Tom Llama thinks that covering up the treasonous actions of Democratic politicians makes him a jounalist.

I would like to ask him what term he would use to describe the progeny of third world barbarians who are invading our country?

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

When Harris' father heard the police version, he disupted it.

When he saw the video tape of his son shooting at the police, he was heard to mutter, "that camera was probably made by honkys and must be racist too."

- Cynical Pessimist

The mainstream media found a police chief who believes police officers have a duty to stand down and allow protestors to burn and loot homes and businesses proclaimed that "The presence of the armed Oath Keepers was both unnecessary and inflammatory."

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

When his white and Jewish supporters asked for clarification, Barack Hussein Obama stated, "those are not inflammatory comments, but simply a statement of fact."

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

The Nazi Party is waiting for an apology from the United States for opposing Germany during World War II because Adolf Hitler was "as pro-Israel as it gets" during his term in office.

- Cynical Pessimist

An aid interrupted President Obama to prevent him from giving the same speech to the Senators and Congressmen that he gave to the Ayatollah. The aid then gave the President the factually false speech that would be needed to gain the support from the Senators and Congressmen and the American Public.

- Cynical Pessimist

I believe it is power grabbing, hypocritical, totalitarian politicians who are more concerned with the climate than all the evil caused by their anti-humanistic policies that will doom the human race to extinction.

- Cynical Pessimist

A number of Kenyan terrorists were upset at being publicly exposed and were calling out to CNN to apologize for the comment.

- Cynical Pessimist

The Cynical Pessimist agrees with Progressive Netroots Nation that "all lives don't matter" because it is obvious that with the increase of foreign invaders and terrorists killing white people and police that white lives don't matter. What the Cynical Pessimist doesn't understand is that if black lives matter, why do the loud mouth hypocrites who pretend to care about black lives when ended by white people don't care about blacks slaughering blacks in the inner city slums created by the race baiting democratic or black political leaders.

- Cynical Pessimist

The Cynical Pessimist disagrees and thinks that "as a nation, we need to apologige to the world for an educational system that creates people like Senator Bernie Sanders (I-Vermont) and the people who vote for him.

- Cynical Pessimist

However, to keep his constituency happy, this new proposed law will not apply to Muslims or anyone else that believes that "Death To Americans" is an appropriate greeting.

- Cynical Pessimist

One of the guards muttered, "It's not to late to fix that since you belong in prison for your treasonous actions as the President."

- Cynical Pessimist

In response, I'd like to say that President Obama could be good for America if he wasn't a hate filled racist socialist idealogue who particularly hates American and everything it used to stand for.

- Cynical Pessimist

I would like to be the first to suggest that since those rogue lawless cities are determined to make themselves into safe havens for foreign criminals, we should call them Death Traps for Law Abiding Citizens.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

"It’s lamentable that the senseless and tragic act of violence that occurred in San Francisco is prompting a rush to judgment and finger pointing: we can and should do better," O’Malley said in the statement.

He continued, "However, it is perfectly reasonable for a rush to judgement and finger pointing when blaming law abiding gun owning citizens who wish to defend themselves from senseless and tragic acts of violence."

- Cynical Pessimist

Most Americans want to apologize to the world for allowing the world to think that America is full of people like Bernie Sanders.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

President Obama is working hard on freeing the United States from the imprisonment of the Constitution.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

They no longer need to worry. His legacy is now secure. The United States of America has now entered the unrecoverable downward spiral to becoming a 3rd world hell hole since there is no opposition party to reject this obamanation.

It started with Nancy Pelosi convincing the politicians who are supposed to represent the people to abdicate their responsibility and commit treason by voting for a bill they hadn't read.

It continued with treasonous race-baiting Marxist Barack Hussein Obama declaring that if the Congress and the Senate won't pass the laws he wants, then he will issue executive decrees to obtain the results he wants.

It ended with the judicial tyranny of the Supreme Court treasonously ruling that since nobody bothered to read the Affordable Care Act, it doesn't matter what the words say. All that matters is that the words mean whatever the treasonous race-baiting Marxist Barack Hussein Obama wants them to mean.

In other words, we are now living in a Liberal paradise.

- Cynical Pessimist

believe transgender children know what sex they are, but believe that gender is a social construct.

support leftist professors who supress free speech and thought while teaching diversity, but claim that the same leftist professors would slaughter minority students if given guns.

don't mind that millions of illegal aliens voted for your candidate, but are terrified that legal voters might be convinced to vote against your candidate.

think punishing law abiding citizens for what criminals do is common sense.

think guns are bad, but want the police to be the only ones allowed to carry guns.

believe that walls don't stop alien invaders, but bigoted racist cops who oppress minorities stop crime.

believe we need big government because people are too stupid to run their own lives, but the stupid people are smart enough to vote for the elites who want to control them.

believe in human rights, except where they conflict with Sharia Law.

believe that Donald Trump being elected President of the United States is the worst thing that could ever happen, but don't think beheadings, stabbings, suicide bombings, raping of women and children by Muslims is anywhere near as bad.

believe gun violence is a problem, but don't think beheadings, stabbings, suicide bombings, raping of women and children by Muslims is a problem.

believe that destroying public and private property by rioting and looting is the appropriate response when a black cop kills a black thug.

believe that when a black cop kills a black thug that white racism is at fault.

don't believe in building walls to protect the country from alien invaders, but you do believe in building walls to protect the Democratic Nation Convention from undocumented delegates.

believe that anyone saying anything that offends you is a terrorist, but don't think someone shouting "Allahu Akbar" before killing men, women and children is a terrorist.

instantly judge that any time a black is killed by a policeman you rush to explain that the cop is a racist, but refuse to rush to judgement and because we need to investigate the motives of anyone who shouts "Allahu Akbar" before indiscriminately slaughtering men, women and children.

believe all police are racist killers, but you belive you will be safer if police are allowed to own guns and you aren't.

believed your college teachers who taught you to question authority, but didn't have a problem when they told you not to question them.

believe that Barack Hussein Obama won the war on terrorism workplace violence, but believe the State Department warning that Americans travelling in Europe are targets for terrorists.

are a feminist and are concerned with the rape culture in America, but are not concerned with the rape culture in Muslim countries where a woman can be executed for the crime of being raped.

believe that you live in a country where the majority of the population are white racists, but don't question how a black man could be elected as president of the United States, twice, by all those white racists.

believe that rape culture exists in America and that 1 in 4 women are raped at school, but you send your daughters to college anyway.

believe that Ben Carson doesn't have enough experience to be president, but that Barack Hussein Obama with even less experience did have enough experience.

believe that explaining the truth about Planned Parenthood selling body parts is rhetoric that leads to violence, but that Barack Hussein Obama proclaiming that all police are racist killers of black men doesn't lead to violence.

believe there should be a national registry for Jews and Christians, but not for Muslims.

believe that making schools gun free zones makes them safer, but you refuse to put a gun free zone sign in your front yard.

support an invading army of welfare recipients, but are upset when the government wants to put low income housing in your neighborhood.

are upset that the Veterans Administration Hospital lets 1/3 of all patients die before a doctor sees them, but still think the government should manage your health care.

demand punishment for doctors that through accident or neglect let patients die, but don't mind that the government hasn't punished anyone at the Veterans Administeration for letting hundreds of thousands of patients die.

believe that being transparent is lying to the press and covering up your past.

read a news story about about a woman shooting her rapist and all you can think about is how we have too much gun violence and how the victim would be much better off if she had called the police after being raped instead of shooting her attacker.

read a story about a police office protecting himself from an attacker and you think the cop is a racist hatemonger until you find out the cop was black and the attacker was white at which point you believe the shooting is justified.

support an open immigration policy, but believe America and Americans are racist, sexist, homophobic, Islamaphobic, evil people.

support Black Lives Matter by rioting and looting and shooting police, but are silent when a a couple of black gang members spray bullets at each other and kill black children playing in their yard or sitting in their house.

protest the rape culture in America where a man even looking crosseyed at a woman is considered rape, but are silent when male Muslims rape and sell into sexual slavery every woman who is not accompanied by a male protector.

support women's rights in American by complaining about male unconscious bias, but are silent when Muslim men purchase 13 year old girls as wives and beat them for disobeying or contradicting the man.

support gay rights in American by complaining when one bakery refuses to sell a cake, but are silent when Muslims in foreign countries routinely slaughter gays.

think calling some Muslims terrorists is bigoted and hateful, but see nothing wrong with calling all police racist bigots.

you support the tax the wealthy Democrat / Socialist platform, but are upset when your taxes go up.

think your narrative is so important that it is acceptable to lie and slander Republicans, but you believe that truthfully reporting on Democrats criminal activity is hate speech.

think that getting 4 traffic tickets in 17 years is a scandal, but leaving $25 million off a tax return is an acceptable minor oversight.

think that owing money for a student loan or a mortgage is a henious crime, but while being secretary of state and accepting millions of dollars from foreign influence peddlars is a non-issue.

believe in free speech for everyone, but not for people who disagree with you.

believe that everyone is good, but not the people who disagree with you.

are a white male, but believe all the problems in the world are caused by white males.

think that Mitt Romney maintaining profiles of women he wants to hire is oppressive of women, but Muslims who sell 12 year old girls as wives or kill single females for appearing in public with single men is not oppressive of women.

think that asking for a picture ID to vote is racist, but asking for a picture ID to to cash a check, drive a car, fly on a plane, apply for a job, collect welfare, ... is not racist.

believe that creating suffering and misery is okay if you have good intentions, but if someone has what you consider bad intentions and it creates prosperity and happiness it is bad.

believe that drawing Muhammad is offensive to the faithful and whoever does that must be punished with death, but believe that pissing on Jesus or throwing dung at the Virgin Mary is a perfectly acceptable expressions of free speech.

are offended by someone flying the American flag in America, but enjoy seeing the flags of Mexican and other countries flown in America.

don't know who to blame when a white woman is raped by a black man. After all, it can't be the rapists fault because of his lifetime exposure to joblessnes, poverty, despair, hopelessness, and racism.

think that denying the fraud of global climate change is the same as denying gravity.

think like Obama that all laws must be obeyed and enforced, except for the laws you don't want to obey and enforce.

supported Obama, but claim that no Republican candidate has the experience necessary to be President.

think that all minorities need special privlidges because they are incapable of applying for identification or competing against white males, but think that a Republican who agrees with you is a racist.

believe the Constitution is a living document that evolves with the times when discussing the freedom of the press when you want to slander conservatives via twitter, blogs, radio and television, but you think it is frozen in the 18th century when talking about the right to bear arms, meaning it only applies to ownership of firearms that existed at that time (flintlock pistols and rifles).

believe that for Democrats to change the law all they need to do is re-interpret it, but if Republicans want to change the law they need to go through the legislature.

live in a gated community for protection, but think fences won't protect our border.

believe that Christians need to apologize for their uncivilized behavior 1,000 years ago, but the Muslims don't need to apologize for their uncivilized behavior today.

object to being forced to have your child vaccinated, but think it is acceptable to be forced to purchase health care insurance.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

However, the Democratic National Committee thinks that anyone who can lie that convincingly to the public about their accomplishments, would make a good running mate for Hillary Clinton who also spends a large part of her time lying to the public about her accomplishments.

- Cynical Pessimist

Come for the welfare, stay for the healthcare.

- Cynical Pessimist

However, working with Jonathan Gruber he has created a strategy for convincing the stupid American voters that ISIS is not a threat.

- Cynical Pessimist

In response, a right-wing environmental scientist claimed that 10% of the population has lying sensitivity and that listening to Hillary Clinton and Barack Hussein Obama is making them sick.

- Cynical Pessimist

The recent struggle to raise the minimum wage to $15.00 per hour proves the Liberal Left hates the poor.

If the Liberal Left didn't hate the poor, they would make the minimum wage $100.00 per hour. In that way the unskilled and uneducated would be paid as much as the haters and lackwits in congress who never worked a day in their lives and don't understand work, business or economics.

Unlike the government which steals (taxes) the working class, businesses can only operate if they make a profit. If the cost of doing business exceeds the profit, the businesses have two choices:
1) close their doors and fire everyone.
2) raise the price of their product.

If a business closes their doors and fires everyone, then the number of jobs and employees is reduced.

If the business raises their prices, then the employee who just received his raise, now needs to pay more. The employee ends up no better off than before, and sometimes even worse off. Because of the minimum wage increase, ALL the other businesses need to raise their prices to adjust for their higher cost of doing business. Now the employee may need to quit his job and get on the government dole to afford the inflated prices caused by the minimum wage hike.

Proof positive that the Liberal Left hate the poor and are stupid.

- Cynical Pessimist

Bill Clinton explained he is bringing in the philandering husband vote because of his relationships with Monica Lewinsky and other women while remaing married to Hillary Clinton.

Bill Clinton explained he is bringing in the pedophile vote because of his frequent flyer mileage on the Lolta Epress with pedophile Jeffrey Epstein.

Bill Clinton explained he is bringing in influence peddlers because of the Clinton Foundation accepting donations from pedophile Jeffrey Epstein.

As a bonus, Bill is bringing in women and LGBT hypocrites (although it is difficult to call a liberal a hyypocrite because you must be irrational at best, or insane at worst to support the liberal platform) because the Clinton Foundation is accepting millions of dollars from nations that routinely kill LGBT and sell females as young as five years old to become wifes.

Hillary Clinton, not to be outdone by Bill, proclaimed that she supports same sex marriage. When reporters her asked to explain her position on same sex marriage, she said, "I prefer to be on top."

- Cynical Pessimist

Bill Clinton, while not in the video, spent the weekend at the brothel looking for an intern who knows how to do laundry in addition knowing when to open her mouth and when to keep it closed.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Evidently, since 2008 ALL Democratic politicians who are elected and paid to read all bills before voting on them, have switched to a "you must vote to find out what is in this bill" mentality. The thing is, if they won't read before voting, then a chimpanzee can do their job as well as they can, and at a much lower cost.

It's a good thing that all Democrats are brain dead and are incapable of remembering what they said more than 5 minutes ago. Otherwise, how would they be able to complain about what Republicans are doing.

- Cynical Pessimist

At the Democratic Party press conference afterwards, the leaders all proclaimed that while they felt it was completely acceptable to require Republican voters to show identification, it was racist, sexist, ageist, and IQist to expect the stupid Americans who are their supporters to be able to acquire identification. It also imposed undue hardships on cartoon characters and the dead to expect them to acquire identification.

To support their position, they had planned on having on stage a number of typical Democratic voters to answer questions about the unfairness of this law. The Democratic party leaders were embarrassed when it turned out everyone on the stage had been required to show identification to enter the building where the press conference was being held.

They were even more embarrassed when it turned out that a Republican reporter had snuck into the conference and asked if anyone could name any aspect of modern life that didn't require identification.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Every time someone asked her a questions, she stood up, threw her hands over her head, and shouted, "Hands up. Don't Shoot. I can't breathe."

At the end of her press conference, she thanked the reporters for their insightful questions and hoped that her answers would finally stop the conservative media circus and their persecution of a truthful hardworking politician who might have made a few honest mistakes.

- Cynical Pessimist

Hillary continued, "When I reviewed my emails prior to deleting the incriminating ones, I found a message from Ambassador Stevens in my spam folder. I'm sure the next of kin of Ambassador Stevens understand that accidents happen. I apologized to them and to the American people and categorically state that will never happen again."

When asked about the security on her server, Hillary Clinton responded, "My server is protected by the Wicked Witch of the West and her army of flying monkeys so it just was not possible that my server was hacked."

In conclusion, she said, "Since I have never lied about anything, not even the death of Ambassador Stevens being caused by a YouTube video, that you can trust me when I say I turned over all the relevant messages to the lame-ass brain dead member's of congress."

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

When an aide reminder her she wasn't talking about her failure to protect the lives of American diplomats, she said, "Laws, laws, we don't need no stinking laws!"

- Cynical Pessimist

President Barack Hussein Obama offered his services as a negotiator to open a dialogue so that future misunderstandings like this can be avoided.

- Cynical Pessimist

President Obana and Attorney General Eric Holder both agreed and are looking into moving the trial to Iraq or Syria.

- Cynical Pessimist

President Barack Hussein Obama said, "No matter how long it takes, the United States will find and bring to justice the terrorists who are responsible for Kayla's captivity and death."

Since the President personally won the war on terrorism, he apologized to the Nation of Islam for his misstatement. The Preident continued, "We will find a YouTube video to blame for this event. We will draw lines in the sand. We will do everything else within our power to obtain justice for Kayla Jean Mueller as long as it does not offend any Muslim."

- Cynical Pessimist

Pathological liars and socialpaths need to know that they have other career paths than politics, law and used car sales.

- Cynical Pessimist

A number of Imams are rushing to get the slaughter of infidels approved for devout Muslims who happen to be in prison.

A number of Democrats Liberals are rushing to get their political party reclassified as a religion so that when they carry concealed weapons to use for expressing their objections to private ownership of wealth they will be ready to proceed with the distribution of wealth in the way that only they know best.

- Cynical Pessimist

Yup. President Obama certainly is being treated like all help these days. He is overpaid and underqualified for a job he is incapable of performing, and which he won't voluntarily quit until it is too late to fix the damage he has done while on the job.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Because of the incompetence of the Three Stooges of news reporting, ABC, NBC and CBS, in covering up or providing a positive spin on the comments of Jonathan Gruber, I now understand how Barack Hussein Obama got elected twice. The racist white Christians who voted for Barack Hussein Obama for president, twice, were just too dumb to notice that Barack Hussein Obama is a black, Muslim, Marxist.

- Cynical Pessimist

Neither did I.

Nothing makes more sense for civil rights protesters upset with the government than burning and looting their next door neighbors businesses.

- Cynical Pessimist

No rapist or murder wants to face an armed victim, therefor all victims must be disarmed so that all victims face the same chance of survival.

Or to put it into a bumper sticker sized slogan that the democrat / liberal / progressive / leftist can understand:

Gun Control: because every woman should have an equal chance of being raped and murdered.

Gun Control: because a woman carrying a gun is less likely to get raped and murdered than one who isn't.

Gun Control: because it is unfair that a woman who carrys a gun is less likely to get raped and murdered than one who doesn't.

I support gun control because it is unfair that armed women are less likely to be raped and murdered than unarmed women.

I support Gun Control because it is unfair that a woman who carries a gun is less likely to get raped and murdered than one who doesn't.

I support gun control because it saves lives of terrorists, murderers, rapists, kidnappers and other criminals. Innocent victims, not so much.

We need gun control because most law enforcement personnel would prefer to be slaughtered by criminals than saved by citizens.

Preventing law abiding citizens from owning guns to prevent criminal violence is like banning lifeboats to prevent drowning.

Terrorist support gun control because it makes it easier to slaughter the sheeple.

Terrorist support gun control because who needs guns when you have edged weapons and bombs.

Terrorist support gun control because when seconds count, help is minutes away.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

This is causing a major transportation problem in Washington D.C.

The President is running out of buses to throw his supporters under.

- Cynical Pessimist

One of the reporters replied, "We did our best to obfuscate and hide the truth from the American public, but not all Americans are as stupid as we like to think they are."

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

The Republicans replied that President Barack Hussein Obama is committing national suicide with his comprehensive immigration reform.

- Cynical Pessimist

Unfortunately, when California Governor Jerry Brown complained that employed American Citizens were fleeing his state, Mexican President Enrique Pena Nieto had no advice on how to fix that problem.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

He promised that no matter what the cost in time, effort and money his crack investigators will punish the creator of the YouTube video that cased this unfortunate event.

- Cynical Pessimist

In non-political speak, this means Barack Hussein Obama plans on shutting down any organization that protects the United States borders from an invasion by Islamic terrorists, Mexican drug lords and any other groups that have no members that are old white men.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- The Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Nancy: "Did you hear that the backlog of people waiting to get into Heaven is being reduced?"

Harry: "Yes. I heard about it from Satan's press agents, Jay and Susan. Since they never lie, then what they said must be true."

Nancy: "That makes sense. After all, even if Satan told a disingenuous prevarication, Jay and Susan are not lying if they are simply repeating inaccurate information."

Harry: "When do you think our names will be moved from the current waiting list to the real one?"

Nancy: "The rumors of a phony waiting list must be a smear campaign to hurt the reputation of Satan. He would never allow corruption in hell. It must be the work of rogue low level demons."

The two demons tormenting Nancy and Harry looked at each other and sighed.

Demon 1: "This job just isn't satisfying any more."

Demon 2: "Tell me about it. Ever since the creation of the T.S.A. on Earth, nothing we do seems to bother the new arrivals. How could we have known that every single offensive and degrading procedure we tortured souls with for centuries, would be implement by their government on the pretense that it would make them safer. I'll bet that if we wore T.S.A. uniforms some people might not even realize that they are in hell and being tortured."

- Cynical Pessimist

Eric Holder, the mastermind behind the "Fast and Furius" gun sales to straw purchasers who then turned the weapons over to organized crime, expressed appreciation for the Supreme Court for not ruling on straw purchasers reselling to criminals and organized crime.

Leland Yee now believes that because of his corruption charges, just like Eric Holder, he is no longer subject to the gun trafficing charges for selling weapons to criminals and criminal organizations.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Bloggers from around the country tracked down President Obama to question him about veterans dying in VA hospitals around the ecountry.

President Obama was upset at being interrupted in the middle of an important golf game to be questioned by people that he didn't consider reporters. He then asked what a veteran was, and what country were they from.

Since President Obama couldn't bow down to the leader of the country they came from, he responded by blaming President Bush, a YouTube video and poor customer service before he finally claimed that he knew nothing about this unfortunate situation.

President Obama ended his news conference by complaining about the unwanted terrorist attack on his golf game by stating that he will set up a committee to investigate this problem. He promised that when a rogue low level employee has been blamed for this situation, that beds will roll.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

If this is true, then:

Journalists who are so busy covering up and fawning over the latest verbal ejculations from politicians, desensitizes our children to lies and lying. This makes them unfit for any profession that values honesty or moral integrity. Thus we are producing a generation of politicians, journalists and lawyers.

- Cynical Pessimist

Well I say, if the alternative is the party that says yes to voter fraud, says yes to party politics, corruption and crony socialism, then I my only choice is to say no!

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Harry Reid agreed and stated that Sarah Palin and any Republicans that disagrees with him are on the top of his list for waterboarding.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

They finally found it by reviewing Democratic voter registration records.

The health care navigators are now going around the country to prisons and cemeteries to find names to add to the lists of people signing up for Obamacare.

- Cynical Pessimist

It combines the Democrats love of athletics and with their love of morality. They call this new bill the Democrats Trialathon!

Event 1 - screw an intern (President Bill Clinton)
Event 2 - kill a mistress (Senator Ted Kennedy)
Event 3 - give a speech about protecting womens rights (Congressman Anthony Weiner, Mayor Robert Earl "Bob" Filner)

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Capitalist is unfair because people who work harder and save end up with more than the people who don't.

- Cynical Pessimist

Listening to Obama talk about what is good for America is as believeable as listening to Hitler talking about what is good for the Jews.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama is as much a constitutional lawyer as Adolf Hitler was a humanitarian.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama loves America the same way Adolf Hitler loved the Jews.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama's new motto:
Laws? We don't need no stinkin' laws!

- Cynical Pessimist

Thanks to the success Barack Hussein Obama had with the takeover of the insurance industry we can soon expect to hear:
If you like your constitution, you can keep your constitution.

- Cynical Pessimist

Thanks to the success Barack Hussein Obama had with the takeover of the insurance industry we can soon expect to hear:
If you like your guns, you can keep your guns.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama was recently asked about the troubled rollout of the affordable health care program.
He replied "this would have been much worse if I wasn't president."

- Cynical Pessimist

Q: Why do the Democrats hate the Bill of Rights?
A: They hate anything they think comes from the Right.

- Cynical Pessimist

Q: When is hate speech, not hate speech?
A: When it is spewed by leftists / liberals / socialists / ... and repeated by the mass media!

- The Cynical Pessimist

Q: How can you tell when you have met an honest journalist?
A: He is unemployed and unemployable.

- The Cynical Pessimist

After watching Barack Hussein Obama and the mass media I've had to accept that the new motto of the Democrat (DemonCrap) party is now:
See no truth. Hear no truth. Speak no truth.

- Cynical Pessimist

When did "Hope and Change" become "I was not informed ..."?

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama wants you to know how upset he is that Republican Politicians unfairly attacked him and caused the misunderstanding of his intention that some people would be allowed to keep their health plans.

- Cynical Pessimist

I want to run for office on the Pelosi Platform. You know, you must elect me to find out what I believe in.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama believes that constitution is a living document. I feel the same way about all the other laws he wants me to obey. I feel I should have the same right to misinterpret and break the law that he does.

- Cynical Pessimist

definition of investigative journalist: someone who doesn't wait for the government to issue a press release, but calls up to ask when the next one is coming out.

- Cynical Pessimist

Save the planet. Kill a politician.

- Cynical Pessimist

There isn't any problem that can't be solved by killing all democrats and liberals.

- The Cynical Pessimist

.0001% of the gun owners give the other 99.9999% a bad name.
Liberal solution, ban guns.
99.9999% of the politicians give the other .0001% a bad name.
Liberal solution, ban guns.

- The Cynical Pessimist

Socialism / communism is an alternative to capitalism in much the same way that slavery is an alternative to freedom and poison is an alternative to health food.

- Cynical Pessimist

Legislators and law enforcement officials recently decided that allowing citizens any rights "adversely impacts" criminal investigations.

- Cynical Pessimist

The ONLY function of any government is to oppress the people they claim to serve.

- Cynical Pessimist

The next time you hear about polticians investigating politicians for unethical behavior ask why that makes sense but asking pedophiles to investigate pedophiles for bad behavior doesn't make sense.

- Cynical Pessimist

A hundred trillion here, a hundred trillion there - pretty soon it adds up to real money.

- Cynical Pessimist

What the government is calling too big to fail is actually too stupid to succeed.

- The Cynical Pessimist

If an elephant is a mouse built to government specifications, then, a lie is a truth built to government specifications.

- The Cynical Pessimist

A lie: A truth built to government specifications.

- The Cynical Pessimist

If you are a failure, you didn't get there on your own. Your government did it to you.

- Cynical Pessimist

Recession is when your neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you lose yours. Recovery is when Barack Hussein Obama loses his.

- Cynical Pessimist

Political satire became obsolete when Barack Hussein Obama was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama is protecting America and Americans the same way that Adolf Hitler protected the Jews in Germany.

- Cynical Pessimist

Putting Barack Hussein Obama in charge of fixing the economy is like appointing Adolf Hitler to protect the rights of the Jews.

- Cynical Pessimist

Putting Barack Hussein Obama in charge of fixing the economy is like appointing Jack The Ripper to investigate the Whitechapel Murders.

- Cynical Pessimist

When you think about it, Barack Hussein Obama complaining that Mitt Romney at the debates is not honest, is like Adolf Hitler proclaiming the concentration camps and gas chambers are for the benefit of the Jews.

- Cynical Pessimist

Holder Lied and Americans Died

- Cynical Pessimist

Obama Lied and Americans Died

- Cynical Pessimist

The Barack Hussein Obama Foreign Policy can be easily summed up with the following words: the enemy of my friend is my friend.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama is so upset about the man caused disaster that created a bump in the road to peace by a not optimal occurance that he is setting a special investigative team of elementary school crossing guards to investigate this situation. Results are promised before the end of the next century.

- Cynical Pessimist

When a treasonous, race baiting, hate filled Muslim apologist calls the brutal, organized slaughter of American citizens a man caused disaster creating a bump in the road to peace by a not optimal occurance you know you are in trouble.

- Cynical Pessimist

Just like O.J.Simpson looked for his wife's killers on golf courses throughout the country, Barack Hussein Obama looked for justice for the murders of four Americans at a Las Vegas fundraising event.

- Cynical Pessimist

The United States Government is providing the same protection to travelers inside the borders of the United States they are providing to American travellers and diplomats abroad.

- Cynical Pessimist (following the September 11, 2012 slaughter of unprotected American diplomats where the military was told to stand down rather than attempt a rescue)

I support Barack Hussein Obama because he makes treason, slavery of the masses and the destruction of the United States patriotic.

- Cynical Pessimist

If Barack Hussein Obama was Captain of the Titanic, after the crash he would be telling us how much better off we are than if someone else was captain. He would also be encouraging more passengers to come aboard, but wouldn't allow anyone to leave.

- Cynical Pessimist

Barack Hussein Obama should be thanking the Republicans for the government shutdown. Barack Hussein Obama has created more jobs for jackbooted thugs to harass and prevent American Citizens from visiting National Parks and Monuments than all his prior economic stimulus plans combined.

- Cynical Pessimist

All politicians are evil, corrupt, lying, cheating, ... morons.
But I mean that in a good way.

- The Cynical Pessimist

If you want to hear the truth, you go to the horse's mouth.
When you want to hear politicians speak, you go to the other end.

- The Cynical Pessimist

Welcome to Barack Hussein Obama's America.
The land of debris and the home of depraved.

- Cynical Pessimist

Sonia Sotomayer: "I am not a racist, critics have misunderstood my record."
Adolf Hitler: "I am not an anti-semite, critics have misunderstood my record."

- Cynical Pessimist

When Barack Hussein Obama was given a mandate by lunatics and idiots to destroy the economy of the United States of America, he needed to find an economist that could lie convincingly to the American public about what his policies were really doing to the country. His interview consisted of only one question, "what is 1 and 1?" Barack Hussein Obama kept turning down every economist until one answered, "What do you want it to be?"

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

Now that all the dust has settled and millions of people have lost their insurance and very few of the power elite Barack Hussein Obama caters to have blamed him for the problems, he has declared the Affordable Care Act a smashing success.

This has caused him to rethink his attempts to make the country safe for criminals by keeping guns from the hands of law abiding citizens.

His new landmark legislation will be called the Affordable Gun Act. He has started his new speaking tour where he is promising that all law abiding citizens that already own guns will be able to keep their guns.

- Cynical Pessimist

Therefore Barack Hussein Obama's orders to his thugs and minions to hurt American Citizens as much as possible during the government shutdown, means that American Citizens are Barack Hussein Obama's enemies.
- Cynical Pessimist

A White House spokesman announced today that in keeping with the new gun control zero tolerance policy, all manufacturers of point-and-shoot cameras are being sued for promoting gun violence.

- Cynical Pessimist

In order to better protect Barack Hussein Obama and the people of the United States, the Secret Service on a serious mission in Columbia took time out from their scheduled partying with Columbian Drug Lords, hookers, drugs and Barack Hussein Obama to investigate something negative that Ted Nugent said about Barack Hussein Obama.

- Cynical Pessimist

Increasing the tax on a product, (tobacco, alcohol, ...) is supposed to reduce the interest in consuming the product.

Increasing the tax on income (working) is supposed to increase the interest in paying more tax by working harder and longer to receive less pay.

- Cynical Pessimist

- The Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

In other words, the same people who knew about and refused to act on the threats to the lives of the Americans in Benghazi acted in the same exact way when warned about the threat to the lives of the attendees of the Boston Marathon. They refused to act on the information.

Or to paraphrase Barack Hussein Obama, this would have been much worse if I wasn't president.

- Cynical Pessimist

- Cynical Pessimist

A pedophile was standing in court in front of a liberal judge and jury at the end of his trial.

The judge asked, "is there anything you want to say before the jury adjourns for deliberation?"

The pedophile replied, "Yes, I would like to quote from four great Americans."

"I provided horrible customer service." - I.R.S. commissioner Steven T. Miller

"What difference, at this point, does it make?" - Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton

"We got a lot more important things to move on to." - Secretary of State, John Kerry

And to paraphrase The President of the United States Barack Hussein Obama, "We needed to do this for the kids."

The verdict came back not guilty by reason of being a liberal.

- Cynical Pessimist

Eric Holder, the United States Attorney General who wants us to believe that "I frankly don’t have knowledge of those facts" is all the qualification he needs to run the Department of Justice is a man:

- who feels that lying under oath is his main job.

- who pardons FALN, Weather Underground and other terrorists.

- who feels that terrorist should be treated like jaywalkers and other common criminals.

- who feels that seizing telephone records of reporters has no impact on freedom of the press or privacy.

- who went on record as saying that it doesn't matter if innocent people are convicted of crimes, it is NOT his job to have them released.

- who refused to prosecute Black Panther members for intimidating white voters.

- who approved and / or stonewalled for the White House, the selling of automatic weapans to Mexican drug lords so they could blame the right wing for the gun deaths and untimately disarm potential American vctims for the crimial class (Fast and Furious).

- who sued the state of Arizona for trying to enforce Federal immigration laws the administration prefers to ignore.

is planning on investigating the Internal Revenue Service members who selectively targeted right wing political groups with audits.

I guess I don't need to see the report to know that he will prosecute to the fullest extend of the law every video he finds on YouTube that incited this rogue activity. After all, as a number of great liberal thinkers have pointed out:

What difference, at this point, does it make?

We got a lot more important things to move on to.

We need to do this for the kids.

- Cynical Pessimist

Parents have been getting very upset.

It just came out that a teacher is a porn actress.

Parents are now getting upset that this teacher didn't have sex with her students.

- The Cynical Pessimist

In an effort to pretend that they care, politicians claim to be hard on crime. They keep passing more laws making even more activities crimes. They change the existing laws to make the penalties for existing crimes even harsher. They hire extra prosecutors and extra police to spend more time and money investigating and prosecuting all these crimes. And they build more prisons to hold all the additional criminals.

The problem with this, is that with more and more people becoming criminals, and more and more people being stored in prisons, there are fewer and fewer people left outside of prison to work for a living and pay taxes to support this government provided service.

The politicians in California have come up with a solution for this that they borrowed from the Department Of Game And Wildlife. It is called Catch and Release.

This new program allows the politicians to continue overspending to create new classes of criminals who must be tracked down, captured, and prosecuted. This will prove to the non-criminals that politicians are hard on crime.

Once the criminal has been convicted, the criminal will be released to do whatever criminals do when they are not in a cell waiting for trial. This will prove to the non-criminals that the politicians are interested in balancing the budget.

Seems like a win win solution to me.

- The Cynical Pessimist

Is the priesthood running out of cities, states and countries to transfer you too? Are the local law enforcement agencies closing in on you?

Then the T.S.A. wants you. In an effort to enslave and subjugate the citizens of the United Socialist States of American we are looking for a few good perverts to assist in this transition. Prior sexual assault convictions are not required but do get you hiring priority. Membership in any hate group, Nazis, K.K.K., Islam or other pseudo religious cults that have a history of subjugating others based on race, creed or color is also acceptable proof of job qualifications.

For any applicants that do not reside in the United Socialist States of American, we are leaving our southern border unprotected so that you can more easily enter our country to apply for all the benefits available for all the illegal entrants to our country.

Remember, you are not a pedophile or a deviant. You are just practicing to protect the rights of the government to treat the people with the contempt they deserve for allowing the government to run amok.

This has been a public service message from the T.S.A.

- Cynical Pessimist

President Barack Hussein Obama appointed Timothy Geithner to be his new Secretary of Treasury.

This is a man who understands the economy (including taxes) so well that when it came time to prepare his tax returns, he didn't ask for help and made almost $43,000 worth of mistakes.

This is a man who understands the economy so well that he helped create a $700 billion dollar banking bailout (welfare for the rich) that needed immediate passage (but wouldn't show results for years), and does NOT require any oversight on how the funds are distributed or how they are used.

After all, who wants someone capable of preparing his own return correctly to oversee the Internal Revenue Service, or someone who doesn't have a history of screwing up the economy to run the United States Treasury.

- Cynical Pessimist

One of the first executive orders Barack Hussein Obama signed after being inaugurated is to close the Guantanamo prison (Gitmo). This is the holding camp where suspected terrorists are being held.

After all, shouldn't foreign enemies of this country who believe in strapping on bombs and walking into elementary schools, resturants and other public gathering places be treated with the same dignity and respect as citizens who jaywalk and speed are given?

- Cynical Pessimist

DATELINE: Washington, D. C.

Press Conference

Barack Hussein Obama's left hand man announced that the President of the United States would be undergoing surgery in the near future. The President planned on having his right arm and right leg amputated. He also planned on having his right eye, right lung, right ... removed. The president felt this move was necessary to provide an image of a fair, balanced and unbiased individual who can represent all his supporters.

- Cynical Pessimist

One morning, at his daily poll briefing, Barack Hussein Obama was ranting at his staff of minions and henchmen that while his popularity ratings seem to be going up, his approval ratings seem to be going down.

After calming down a bit, he asked his staff of sycophants, to come up with a solution to this problem. He suggested that the staff think about how his good friends and fellow leaders (like: Kim Jong-il, Fidel Castro, Moammar Kadafi, ...) and favorite groups (like: Taliban, P.L.O, Communists, terrorists, ...) would handle this situation.

Later that week, Barack Hussein Obama overheard a couple of generals in the Pentagon discussing a possible solution that would require killing millions of Catholics and a few Muslims. Barack Hussein Obama got very upset at this and screamed at the generals that no solution was acceptable if it caused the death of even a single Muslin.

- Cynical Pessimist

- The Cynical Pessimist

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